Bases Loaded
by Dubenko Junkie
Summary: Can Dr. Dubenko juggle the demands of his difficult his daughter and those of a new relationship at the same time? COMPLETE.
1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:** This is a third story in an ongoing series, **_Back in the Game_** and **_Curveball_** should be read before this one to give you a fuller understanding of the over-all plot, however I think there is enough back story explained here that readers can enjoy this one by itself. I'm not usually one for long notes as a preface, however, this time I feel it's justified. My beta, Allison deserves a great deal of credit for this story. Not only has she weeded through my seemingly never-ending story to fix typos and grammatical errors, but she has contributed to plot points and character development as well. If would allow it, she'd be listed as a co-author this go round because I feel that she's contributed as much to this story as I have. An honorable mention also goes to her husband (who is NOT getting a pie, thank you very much) for contributing one of my favorite lines in this story. Also, I need to mention Lisa A. for her input on what constitutes a perfect date.

**Disclaimer: **I do not own the ER universe; that belongs to the folks at NBC, WB studios, John Wells, Amblin Entertainment and a whole slew of other people. Andrew Hollinsworth is also not mine, I'm borrowing him from the film Resurrection and will put him back when I'm finished playing with him. Once again, Sophia and Marti Dubenko are solely my creations. Allison Chapman, well she's mine too. Mostly. About 1/3 of her belongs to my beta.

**Bases Loaded** _by Dubenko Junkie and Allison E. L. Cleckler_

Yet again there was a problem with the building's plumbing systems and the surgical floor was left with only one available operating room. Dr. Lee Dubenko was beginning to wonder when the rest of County General was going to crumble. The ongoing problems with the sanitation had lead to constant scheduling conflicts between the surgeons and just the day before he had opted to perform a minor invasive procedure right in one of the ER's trauma rooms.

A further result of the reduced OR time for the trauma surgeon was an increase in time he allocated for research. Some of the staff had opted to increase their time on the green to practice golf swings; others simply spent a little more time at home. Lee spent more time in his office. The stacks of papers, charts and case files were starting to overwhelm even that spacious area. The seemingly chaotic décor was what he referred to as "an organized mess." So long as no one else touched anything, he knew precisely where every last piece of data was located.

The same could not be said for Dubenko's telephone. Once more it was hopelessly adrift in a sea of journals, hastily scribbled notes and discarded studies. He could hear the trilling ring of the phone and could guess the general location, but he was unable to uncover the receiver before losing yet another call to his voicemail. He patiently waited for the flashing red light to indicate that he had a message and then dialed his access code.

"Hello, Dr. Dubenko? This is Allison Chapman from the Oncology lab. I hate to bother you again but I really need you to return that stereoscope as soon as possible. Thanks."

_I knew I forgot to do something last night_, he thought to himself as he listened to the pleasant sounding voice of the lab technologist. _That's what? The fourth message she's left me now. _ _I wonder what she'll say when I drop off a bunch of slides along with the scope? _

His current research had left him cross-referencing the instances of recurring fibroid cysts and various malignant tumors. He had collected a large a large amount of data in a very brief time period; however, Dubenko had yet to actually look at the biopsy slides that correlated to the research. He didn't think Miss Chapman would care too much about that fact considering he had kept her stereoscope much longer than he had originally promised. He doubted she'd be willing to lend it to him again any time soon.

Sighing, he gathered up the microscope and the handful of slides. He dropped the slides into the empty pocket of his long white coat before cradling the lab equipment in the crook of his left arm. He raked his free hand through his long curly tangle of hair and headed for the third floor and the Oncology lab.

Through the large glass windows Dubenko could see several lab technicians busily going about their work. At the far counter, standing over a rack of test tubes, was a slender redhead. She had the sleeves of her lab coat rolled up and her hair pulled back in a French braid. It looked to him as though she was trying through sheer force of will, to divine the contents of the little glass vials.

"Excuse me?" he inquired softly as he opened the door to the lab, "I'm looking for Allison Chapman." He addressed his query to the redheaded young woman, whom he had often seen on his numerous trips to the third floor. This was the most he had ever said to her in one breath; usually it was no more than "hello."

"You've found her." She smiled warmly and then looked rather pointedly at the object in his arms. "Dr. Dubenko. My purloiner of property, you are a hard man to get a hold of, you know that?"

She reached for the stereoscope as he laughed genially. "Nice alliteration, Allison." _Idiot, Lee, you are an idiot. _He relinquished the stereoscope as he once again berated himself.

"Not bad yourself, doctor."

"It's ah, just nice to have a name to go with the face. Allison is of German origin, right? It means 'of noble birth.'" He shared the random bit of knowledge with her and was rewarded with a look that belied her amusement.

"I know. It's my name after all. Thanks for bringing this back, we've been swamped in here and short of equipment."

He steadied his gaze on her before responding. "I stand suitably rebuked for my transgression. Well, seeing as I've returned your property--which was borrowed, not stolen, I might add--I'll bid you farewell, your highness." He gave Allison a brief smile before turning to leave.

He caught her puzzled look and merely tossed his head to flip his hair back off his forehead as walked out of the lab. _And you wonder why you spend all of your time in your office or home alone? Flirting is not your forte. What were you thinking anyway? She's at best in her late twenties, though she looks even younger than that. Once again you've managed to convince someone that you are just plain weird, though this is a record, even for you. What was it? Under five minutes?_

He shoved his hands into the pockets of his lab coat and realized that the biopsy slides were still resting in the bottom of his left-hand pocket. _Later_, he thought, _I'll come back up here and ask her to take a look at them._

_

* * *

_

When Dubenko walked back into his office he heard the tell-tale signs of his phone ringing again. This time he managed to catch the call. "Dr. Dubenko."

"Would it kill you to say 'Hello,' Papa?" Sophie Dubenko chided playfully.

"Hi, baby. How are you?" Dubenko relaxed, realizing that the phone call had nothing to do with operating room conflicts or administrative headaches.

"I'm fine. Thinking about making the dog into a pair of slippers and, um, I really hope you weren't too partial to that overstuffed chair in the guestroom because he pretty much ate it." She sighed loudly. "Stupid dog."

"Euthanasia is painless, Soph. And less messy than slipper making." Dubenko laughed. His daughter's dog, aptly named Munch, had the habit of ingesting things not meant to be consumed.

"Papa! You are horrible. I'd never do that. I love my puppy." She always defended the animal when her father suggested a means of its demise.

"Of course you do. And that chair was uncomfortable and your mother hated it, why do you think she put it in the guestroom to begin with?"

"So the interior design police wouldn't lock her up and throw away the key? Anyway, I wasn't really calling about the dog's latest snack. I wanted to let you know that I'd made my flight reservations for winter break. Are you sure you want me around for two whole weeks?"

"Sophie, what kind of question is that? Of course I want you here and for as long as you want to stay. Believe it or not, I actually enjoy your company." If he were honest with himself, he'd admit that he missed her a great deal and hated that she'd opted to stay in Virginia when he relocated to Illinois.

"Just making sure you still love me. So, can I bring Munch with me?" He could almost here her smirking over the phone.

"No. That canine garbage disposal can stay right where he is. Listen, Soph, I have to go. I'm being paged." He didn't wait for her to respond and just hung up the phone as he looked at the display on his pager. She was used to him ending conversations abruptly.

* * *

"Got the page. Hi, I'm Dr. Dubenko, trauma surgeon." He addressed the ER attending and the patient at the same time. He looked up at Dr. Kovac in surprise when he noted the patient was a child. "Do you need to get someone from pediatrics down here?"

"They're swamped," the thick-accented voice of the Croatian born doctor replied.

"You talk funny." The young boy was maybe seven or eight, wide eyed and staring at Kovac. "And you're really, really big."

Dubenko had to resist laughing as he pressed his stethoscope to the child's bare chest. A nurse had already started an IV and hooked up the heart monitor.

"That's cold! Why is that other doctor so much taller than you? Why do you have hair like a girl? Hey, what's that do?" The boy rambled on as Dubenko picked up an oxygen mask and slipped it over the child's head.

"Keeps little boys from talking to much," he responded with a smile. _Was Sophie ever this talkative? No, she was ten times more verbose and you know it. She still is. _"What's the injury, doctors? Chest sounds clear."

"Abdominal bruising, car accident, not wearing a seatbelt properly," Kovac answered. "Sam went to get the portable ultrasound."

Dubenko began to gently palpitate the boy's abdomen, feeling for signs of internal injury.

"Ow! That hurts! Why'd you do that?" The child had pulled the oxygen mask off.

"Sorry." Dubenko stopped and looked at Kovac, he mouthed the word "Parents?" silently and frowned when the other doctor shook his head. They must not have survived the crash. Dubenko felt a surge of sympathy for the young boy.

Sam, the petite blonde nurse, brought in the ultrasound before the child could fire off any more questions. She pulled the mask back on to his face with a smile. "You need to leave that on, sweetheart."

The boy made a face at her.

Luka smiled at the boy and addressed Sam. "Why don't we just get him an oxygen tube so that he doesn't have to wear that?"

As she approached with the thin clear tubing the boy again began talking. "Hey, where's that go? Ew, in my nose? Mom always says not to stick things up my nose. I once got a pea stuck in there. It felt funny."

"I have to agree with your mom there." Dubenko looked at the chart Kovac had started, scanning it for the boy's name. "Jackson, this is going to feel funny too. I'm going to put some gel on your belly so that we can see what's going on in there, okay?" he explained as he prepared to do the ultrasound.

A short while later Dubenko was taking the boy up to the OR to repair the damage to his abdominal wall. A tear in the muscles had resulted in a small hernia. The child studied him with wide eyes and a look of trepidation. "Is it gonna hurt?"

"No. You'll be asleep."

"But I'm not tired."

Once inside the elevator, Dubenko leaned against the rail of the gurney. "You will be, Jackson." He smiled at the child.

"How do you know that?"

"I'm a doctor, I'm supposed to know these things." It was an answer he used to give his daughter when she'd endlessly question him at that age. Just as it seemed to satisfy a young Sophia Dubenko, Jackson settled down and remained quiet for the rest of the elevator ride.

* * *

It was several days later before Dr. Dubenko was able to make his way back down to the Oncology Lab with his biopsy slides. When he arrived the same technologist, Allison Chapman, greeted him only this time she wasn't smiling.

"No." She didn't even look up from the microscope she was looking through.

"Pardon?" Dubenko was slightly taken aback by her manner and steeled himself to go into what his late wife always called "Dr. Dickhead mode", when he simply pulled the status card to get what he wanted.

"You can't have my microscope." She changed slides and scribbled some notes on a pad of paper. "I got my ass chewed by my supervisor for letting you walk off with our equipment the last time. Might not mean a lot to you, but I'd like to keep my job, mundane as it is."

"Um, I don't want your microscope. I just wanted to drop off some biopsies that need to be read. You _do_ still handle that, correct?" His tone was a bit more condescending than he intended and Dubenko immediately regretted it. "I'm sorry if I got you in trouble with your superior. I'll go through the proper channels next time and requisition any equipment I require."

"It's okay, it was my fault for letting you. I'm too much of a pushover, I guess. And yes, I or someone else will take care of your slides. When do you need them?" She finally looked up at him; her red hair was falling out of the loose ponytail she wore.

Dubenko's fingers itched to reach out and tuck the flyaway strands behind her ear. The urge surprised him and he instead fumbled with the handful of slides, nearly dropping them on the floor. "Today if possible."

"I'll leave a note for the guys on the swing shift then, I'm out of here in about twenty." She looked at her watch. "Make that fifteen."

He gave her a lopsided smile and ran his fingers through his hair. _What are you waiting for, Lee? Say something. Ask her out. Stop staring at her like some sort of idiot savant._ "Al…Allison? Um, would…would you like to grab a cup of coffee after your shift?" _Niiiiiiiiice. What are we? Twelve and afraid of icky girl germs?_

She looked at him for a long moment before answering, a soft smile on her face. "I'd love to but I can't. I'm meeting my roommate and her fiancé for dinner. Wedding-planning stuff. I think she wants me to wear something pink with a bow the size of Texas on my behind. To the wedding, I mean. Not to dinner."

Dubenko ran his hand through his hair again and looked at the floor as if his white sneakers held some sort of solution. "Maybe some other time then." His voice was soft and he tried to hide his disappointment at being turned down and his embarrassment for asking in the first place. _There isn't going to be another time, she's trying to let you down gently. Say goodbye and go back to hiding in your office. It's what you excel at._

_

* * *

_

"Dr. Dubenko?" Chapman was standing in front of him now, looking at him with concern on her face, questioning in her eyes.

"Thank you for, ah, looking at the slides. I'll come back to get the results later. Have a nice evening, Miss Chapman." He walked out of the lab as quickly as his feet could take him.

He didn't notice the young redhead watching after him as he moved swiftly down the hall towards the elevators.

The following evening, Dr. Dubenko was intently working in his office when a knock on his open door caused him to glance upwards. Standing in the doorway was a thoughtful looking Allison Chapman. She grinned at him and stepped into his office proper before he could utter a greeting.

"Hi, I was going to grab a cup of coffee across the street and wondered if you'd like to join me?"

Dubenko fumbled with the three-ring binder he had been holding and inadvertently knocked over a stack of case files, sending paper cascading across the floor. _You are pathetic. You give the other Yale graduates a bad name. For someone so brilliant you sure act like such a fool at times. Say something to the woman. _Dubenko resisted the urge to bang his head on his desktop and instead gave the lab tech a wan smile.

"Coffee…sounds really good right about now."

She laughed. "Yeah, you look like you could use a break."

He sheepishly looked at the mess on his office floor, then back up at the ginger-haired woman. "I'm obviously not going to get the Morbidity and Mortality findings to Dr. Weaver any time soon."

Standing up and stepping over the sea of paper, Dubenko exchanged his lab coat for his jacket. "Shall we?"

"We shall." Allison smiled as he gestured for her to proceed through the door before him.

They walked to the convenience store across from the hospital in relative silence. Dubenko was desperately trying to think of something to say that was neither too banal nor too cerebral for casual conversation. He was drawing a complete blank. Instead, he settled on stuffing his hands in his pockets and jangling the loose coins within.

As they waited for the light to turn, Allison put her hand on his forearm. "That's kind of grating on the nerves. Do you mind?"

Dubenko blushed and muttered, "Sorry. Bad habit."

She looked at him kindly and then winked. "You're kind of cute when you blush. Did you know that?"

This only caused the doctor to redden deeper and duck his head. When the light changed, Dubenko bolted across the street causing Allison to break into a near-jog to keep up. He held the door open for her, mentally chiding himself for his less than graceful reaction.

After the pair had their cups of coffee in hand, they made their way back towards the ambulance bay. They sat watching passersby and sipping the hot drinks, Dubenko occasionally glancing at his companion and smiling softly, though he failed to say anything to her.

"You know, I didn't mean to embarrass you earlier," Allison remarked while looking into her cup.

"Oh, no…it's all right. I have a tendency to fiddle with things without really noticing. Nervous energy, I suppose."

"I wasn't talking about the loose change." She looked up at him as she said this.

"Oh." Dubenko could feel the flush creeping up his neck again.

"Dr. Dubenko—"

"Lee. Please."

"Lee, maybe I'm barking up the wrong tree here, so feel free to tell me if I am, but the other day when you asked me if I wanted to grab a cup of coffee after work I assumed that meant you were, at least marginally, interested in me."

Dubenko was having a hard time maintaining eye contact as she spoke. He kept looking over Allison's shoulder and down at his own, now empty, cup. "I…I, um, I was. I am. I mean…I'd like to get to know you better."

"Great. Then you'll have dinner with me tomorrow night? Please say yes. I can't face another night of roommate torture."

He couldn't resist smiling at her as he replied. "Still being forced to wear a hideous bow on your posterior?"

"I don't want to talk about it."

"That bad?"

"Would you like to have dinner with me or not?"

"I would."

They made arrangements for the following evening before heading back inside. Dubenko felt a mixture of apprehension and excitement at the prospect of spending the evening with the lovely technologist. His last attempt at dating hadn't gone so well and he didn't relish the thought of another awkward evening making a fool of himself. _Then again_, he thought, _Allison's the one who asked me out. And she thinks I'm cute. I'm already ahead of the curve this go-round. _He quirked his eyebrows and smirked to himself as he walked back to his office.


	2. Chapter 2

On his days off Lee Dubenko typically still worked, albeit from the comfort of his home. He had intended to do just that when he settled into an over stuffed chair with his laptop around mid afternoon. He checked his email, laughed at something wholly inappropriate that his daughter had sent him and fired off a tongue in cheek response. That was as close to doing any work as he managed to come.

Sitting there in pajama pants and bare feet, he found his thoughts wandering in the direction of his dinner plans that evening and a certain young redheaded woman. _Young indeed. She's probably half your age, you old letch. How would you feel if Sophie was dating someone your age? _Dubenko closed his eyes and let his head fall back against the wall with a soft thud. He repeated the motion. Again. _It's just dinner. Nothing wrong with getting to know your coworkers, is there? Even when they think you are cute. She's pretty cute herself: freckle faced, bright eyed and well the rest of her body isn't bad either. I sound like I'm fifteen. _Sighing, Dubenko closed his laptop and wandered back upstairs to his bedroom.

He paused in front of a full-length mirror and gave himself the once over with a critical eye. He supposed the he didn't look terrible for someone nearing fifty. He stayed in relatively good shape, ate a more or less healthy diet if a little heavy on the take out and burgers, and other than being abysmally near sighted he had little to complain about.

"But am I really that attractive to someone roughly half my age?" He laughed at himself and the absurdity of the situation. Running a hand through his tangled mop of curls Dubenko walked through his room and into the adjoining bath to take a shower.

Towel around his waist, hair dripping down his back, he browsed through his closet trying to figure out what to wear. _You do this every day, Lee, just grab a pair of pants and a shirt. Add a belt and shoes and you're done. _While he was debating his clothing choices, Dubenko grabbed the towel from around his waist and began to dry his hair.

The sound of his phone ringing caused him to drape the towel over his shoulders and swiftly make his way across the bedroom to the phone. He hoped it was anyone but the hospital calling, but he couldn't afford to take the risk of missing a call from work regardless.

"Dubenko." His monotone greeting was anything but welcoming.

"Did I call at a bad time?" It took the doctor a moment to place the voice belonging to his dinner date.

"Chapman…Allison, no. Not at all. I was just preoccupied." He twisted the phone cord between his fingers as he spoke.

"Oh, well, I won't keep you then. I just wanted to make sure we were still on for tonight. And to see if you needed directions."

He caught a glimpse of himself in the mirror, still nude. He automatically stood up straighter and sucked in his gut. "Ah, no. No, I know where you live. I mean, I'm familiar with the area. I'll see you at seven?" He turned sideways, still studying his reflection from across the room. _Yeah, not bad looking for a forty-six year old man, Dubenko._

"So what are you doing right now anyway?" Allison couldn't hide the curiosity in her voice.

Without thinking Dubenko blurted, "Standing here naked, dripping water all over the place."

A loud burst of laughter from the other end of the line caused him to realize what he'd just said. "I, uh, just got out of the shower and was drying my hair when the phone rang…"

More laughter on her end, "Mmm…thanks for the lovely mental images, Lee. Can't wait to see you later."

Hanging up the phone Dubenko brought his hand to his face and chuckled woefully. _I am a USDA certified grade-A moron._

_

* * *

_

As he parked his car near Chapman's apartment building, Dubenko checked his hair in the rearview mirror, wondering not for the first time if he should give in and get the massive mop cut once and for all. _I've worn my hair like this for years; maybe it's time for a change. Then again maybe I'd look like a completely different person with short hair. Is that such a bad thing? _He adjusted his glasses and got out of the car, setting the alarm as he walked the short distance to the apartment's entrance.

Dubenko waited while Allison's roommate buzzed him into the building and opened their apartment door for him. He barely managed to get out a hello before the brunette had disappeared in a blur of fabric samples and ribbons. He fought the urge to chuckle as he heard an exasperated male voice coming from the back of the living space, "Come on Joey, does it really matter if the table cloths are white, ecru, cream or eggshell? Is there even a difference? You're killing me with this stuff, sweetheart."

"Just agree with her Andy, nod and smile. It's what I do," Allison yelled back to the hapless groom to be. She was pulling on a jacket as she walked into the living room where Dubenko was waiting. "Welcome to the madhouse. Let's get out of here before we get asked for our opinions."

"After you," Dubenko opened the door for her and once they were in the relative quiet of the hallway, looked at his date questioningly. "Are they always like that?"

"No, sometimes they're worse." She laughed at his expression before continuing. "I'm kidding, no, they are both really great people and I'm going to miss having my roommate around once they get married. Anyway, the weather's pretty nice and the restaurant is close, do you mind if we walk?"

He offered her his arm and nodded his agreement. She led him to a small quiet bistro that was several blocks away and by the way the hostess greeted her, Dubenko guessed that Allison frequented the eatery.

They opted to sit outdoors on the patio and enjoy the unusually pleasant weather for the time of year. "The pesto is to die for, but really, everything is great here," Allison remarked as Lee scanned the menu.

"Do you come here a lot, then?"

"Yeah, I'm not much of a cook. I make a mean bowl of cereal though. How about you?"

"The last time my daughter came to visit, she claimed that she was going to die of malnutrition because I don't really bother to keep much food in the house. But I can prepare more than a bowl of cereal." He smiled, remembering his daughter's overly dramatic rant about grocery shopping.

"You have a daughter?" Allison looked surprised by his admission.

"Hmm? Yes. Sophia. She's actually planning to spend Christmas here this year." Dubenko didn't offer more of an explanation as the waiter came to take their orders.

"Do you have joint custody or something? Every other weekend and alternate holidays? That's got to be rough."

"What?" Dubenko looked puzzled.

"You said your daughter would be with you for Christmas. She lives with her mother, right?"

He smiled softly. "Ah, no. Sophie's in college back east. Virginia." He wasn't sure how to broach the rest of Allison's query. He played with his napkin and stared off into space as he gathered his thoughts.

"Lee?"

"Sorry, just thinking. Sophie's mother, my wife, she died almost six years ago, Allison…I, ah, never really know how to impart that information." His voice trailed off as he looked at her across the table.

"I'm sorry, God, I feel like an ass." She looked sheepishly abashed.

"It's alright. You couldn't have known." He gave her a sympathetic smile.

"So, ah, college, huh? I wouldn't have thought that you had a daughter old enough to be…" She trailed off as Dubenko's smiled broadened.

"I'm forty-six, I assure you I'm old enough to have a nineteen year old daughter." He watched Allison's expression change from amusement to befuddlement to something he couldn't identify.

"Since we're playing the numbers game here, how old do you think I am?" She rested her chin on her fist as she waited for his answer.

"Ah, twenty-six, twenty-seven?" Inwardly he winced, having a feeling that he was way off the mark.

"Nope."

"Twenty-eight?" _Sure and you're built like Brad Pitt._

"Do I seriously look twenty-eight to you?"

"No. Twenty-five?" _Can you say "cradle robber," Lee?_

"Guess again."

"Twenty-four?" _Please say yes, dear God._

"Nuh-uh. Nice try though." She was smiling now.

"Twenty-three?" _She's younger than your group of med students…way to go._

She snorted. "As of two weeks ago." She was watching him for a reaction.

_You are seriously out of your mind, Dubenko. She's half your age. She could be your daughter. Why are you even contemplating this? _Thoughts raced through his mind as he processed this information. "I, ah, never would have guessed. You've been at County for a few years, haven't you?"

"Three years. Graduated high school a year early and busted my ass in college taking classes over the summer breaks to get my degree as quickly as possible." She bit her bottom lip and reached across the table to touch his hand. "Does it bother you? That I'm a lot younger than you are, I mean?"

He wasn't quite sure how to answer her; he had assumed it would be she who had the problem with their age difference. He admitted as much after the waiter brought out their food.

"I've always considered age to be relative. Besides, have you seen the average twenty-three year-old guy lately? No thanks. I prefer dating higher life forms. I need more in common with someone than basic autonomic functions."

He laughed at that, realizing that his daughter had expressed much the same opinion about her peers. Dubenko took a bite of his dinner and nodded. "You were right about the pesto. So, besides excellent taste in dining venues, where else do your interests lie?"

"Well, I love a good suspense novel, adore changing the scenery in my goldfish aquarium and I'm a film addict. Good, bad, ugly…I pretty much watch them all."

"Does that extend to foreign films?"

"As long as it isn't horribly dubbed. I can't stand that. Give me subtitles any day."

They spent much of the remainder of the meal discussing assorted films, directors and personal favorites in various genres. They eventually worked their way around to discussing pop culture hits and the trilogy of films based on The Lord of the Rings, which led them on a tangent discussing medieval weaponry.

"The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch does not count as a medieval weapon." Allison snorted as Lee Dubenko, in mock seriousness, claimed it to be the most effective means of waging war.

"Do you mean to tell me that Monty Python would portray historical events with anything less than absolute accuracy?"

"Next you'll be asking me about the airspeed velocity of an unladen swallow."

"Fine. A trebuchet."

"A tree bough what?"

"Trebuchet. The trebuchet was the dominant siege weapon in Europe from 850AD to 1350AD, lasting a hundred years after the introduction of gunpowder. In England it was called an ingenium, and the technicians who worked on the weapon were ingeniators, which by the way is where we get the term engineer. Large versions were able to throw boulders, cows or even shunned negotiators. Rotting flesh was also popular. It operated by harnessing the potential energy of a suspended weight." Dubenko stopped when he noticed the look of information overload on Allison's face.

"Let me explain it this way: you know how a see-saw works, right, Chapman?" To demonstrate Dubenko used the salt shaker that was on the table in front of him and his spoon as an impromptu visual aide. "You'd load your ammunition of choice," he placed a crouton in the curved end of the spoon, "and the counter force applied to the other end of the arm would launch it at the enemy."

As he spoke, Lee brought his hand down on the flat end of the spoon, sending the small piece of hardened bread into the air. He watched in horror as the food projectile bounced off Allison's chin and fell down the front of her blouse. He closed his eyes briefly and cursed under his breath. _You just had to ruin a good thing, didn't you Dr. Dumbass? Do you like being single? You must, because there is no way she's going to want to go out with you again_. "I'm sorry—"

As she dug the offending bit of salad topping out of her blouse, Allison laughed. "Thanks for the history lesson, Professor. I believe this is yours." She handed the crouton back to him as she continued to chortle.

Dubenko looked at the proffered object and couldn't resist a chuckle himself. "I, um, really do have better table manners than that. I promise."

"Better to be hit with a crouton than a cow, don't you think?" She winked at him. 

Later that evening, as Dubenko was walking Allison back to her apartment, he couldn't help but think that overall, the date had gone well. She had a sense of humor and was willing to overlook the awkward moments that normally would have sent him into a nervous panic.

"Well, this is me." She smiled sheepishly and pointed at the brownstone walkup behind them. "I've had a wonderful evening. Thank you for dinner and the movie."

Lee returned her smile with one of his own. _Great. Now what? Do I kiss her? Do people kiss on the first date? Hug her? Shake her hand? Kick myself in the ass? _he frantically thought as the slender redhead stared at him expectantly. Automatically, his hands went for the zipper of his jacket and he began to fiddle with the little metal tab. "I—I'm, um, I'm glad. Glad you had a nice time." He stopped and closed his eyes briefly, forced himself to take a deep breath.

Allison took the opportunity to step closer and place a gentle kiss on his cheek. "Good night, Lee."

"Good night." He fought the urge to press his hand to his cheek where her lips had just been. Instead he reached out and cupped her chin, tilting her head to the side before pressing his lips to her mouth once, twice and then, smiling, a third time. "Good night."

"Night." She leaned back on her heels and smiled softly. "I, um, I'm going to go inside."

"Night." Dubenko repeated, again playing with his jacket zipper.

"We've already said that three times now." She laughed at him as she turned to leave. Once she opened her front door she looked over her shoulder and said again, "Good night Lee."

He raised one hand in a half wave as she closed the door. "Night." He couldn't help but smile as he stood out on the sidewalk by himself. _Maybe I can do this dating thing after all. _At that moment the realization that he hadn't asked her out on a second date dawned on him. Dubenko hung his head and chuckled forlornly. _So close and yet so far, Mr. Smooth._

_

* * *

_

Over the next few weeks, Dubenko saw the young technologist outside the hospital as often as both their schedules would allow. During working hours they made a point to meet for coffee, often resulting in Allison joining him in his cluttered office where they'd steal a few extra moments together.

He was enjoying the opportunity to get to know her, letting her know him. He was less awkward and more relaxed in her company as time wore on. It had always taken him a while to find that comfort zone with people on an individual basis, that is if his sometimes odd behavior didn't put them off cultivating a relationship in the first place.

Some of the hospital staff had noticed, and commented amongst themselves, about the marked change in the surgical attending's manner. He was still the efficient, sometimes brusque, no nonsense physician but he was also a lot more outgoing with the staff, jovial at some points. Dr. Lockhart in particular had noticed that Dubenko always had an amused, somewhat distracted smile on his face. She had confided in Dr. Lewis one morning that she was afraid the eccentric surgeon was going to start trying to cozy up to her again.

"Lockhart, good morning. How are you?" Dubenko chatted amicably as they both stood in the elevator bay.

"Um, fine." She gave him one of her less than encouraging looks.

"How was your weekend?"

"I was working."

"Oh. That's a shame; the weather was wonderful. I was at the lakefront and for the first time in years I realized how much I miss sailing. Not that I've done much sailing on a lake, but I used to spend summers at the Cape…" He trailed off as Lockhart yawned and looked at her watch.

"Am I boring you, Lockhart?" Before she could answer, the elevator chimed and the door opened. Dubenko allowed the resident to enter the lift first.

"Hmm? Didn't know you sailed." She answered in a disinterested way that implied that she really didn't care if he sailed or fell overboard and drowned.

Dubenko just smiled at her. "When the weather's warmer, you should give it a try. I'd be glad to show you the ropes."

Lockhart just stared at the senior doctor in disbelief.

"It's not hard. My daughter was tying knots and manning the sails while she was still in primary school."

"Look, I'm sorry but I'm not interested in sailing or anything else with you, okay? I don't want to publish any more papers, I don't want to have dinner and I don't want your advice and lectures on becoming a more assertive doctor." Lockhart stepped out of the elevator and disappeared down the hall before Dubenko could react.

Susan Lewis, the ER Chief, was standing just outside the elevator bay and gave Dubenko an odd look. "What was that about?"

"I think she thought I was coming on to her." He shrugged. "Something I can help you with, Dr. Lewis?"

"Actually, I was up here looking for you. Weaver's on a record keeping warpath and there is a pile of charts I just dumped in your office for you to review. Surgical consults for the ER where my residents never got you to actually sign off. Can you get those to me as soon as possible?"

"I'll see what I can do with them this morning. Have Lockhart check in with me later and she can bring the charts back down to the ER." He smirked.

"You are a glutton for punishment."

"Not really, but I think Lockhart may be."

The blonde doctor laughed as she departed. 

Upon entering his office, the brown haired doctor realized that it was more than a pile of charts that his colleague had left for him. "Well, Dr. Lewis, what have we been doing? Stockpiling these things since the Hippocratic oath was penned?"

Dubenko began sorting through the charts, arranging them in neat piles on the floor near his desk and chuckling to himself as he pictured Lockhart's face when she found out she was going to play messenger boy for him. "Lewis must have made at least three trips up here."

Picking up a stack of charts, Dubenko reached for his phone as well. He dialed his daughter's phone number absently as he scanned the first file in front of him. "Blah blah CT yada yada chest tube blah blah—" he mumbled until he heard the answering machine pick up on the other end.

"This is the refrigerator speaking, the answering machine's on strike. If you'd like to leave a message I'll do my best to spell it out in magnetic poetry." His daughter's recorded voice droned on emotionlessly.

"Somebody needs their medication adjusted, Sophie monster. Are you home baby? Pick up the phone. Sophie? Sophie, Sophie, Sophie—"

"God Papa, could be a little more annoying next time?" She sounded sleepy as she grumbled into the phone.

"Did I wake you?" Dubenko tried his best to sound innocent, but he couldn't keep the amusement out of his voice. Though it was an hour later on the east coast, he knew that Sophia would still be in bed.

"Yes, I'm simply exhausted after a night of drunken debauchery and wild sex," Sophia deadpanned.

"Ah well, so long as you had a good time, baby. How wild? Because you know I strictly look down on anything involving the use of farm animals." He could play the game of one-upmanship better than his daughter and he knew it.

"Disgusting, Papa. Then again, I suppose most frat guys could be classified as farm animals so…what did you call me for anyway? I hope it wasn't to discuss my sex life or lack thereof."

"Trust me, Soph, the less I know about that the better. No, I, uh, wanted to verify just when you were coming in next month. I can't seem to find the paper I wrote your flight information on the last time we spoke." He scribbled a few notes on a chart and signed it, adding it to the pile of completed files for the ER.

"For the love of…Papa, write it down and staple it to your forehead, okay? If you leave me stranded at O'Hare I'll never forgive you." She rattled off flight times and gate arrivals.

"Will it suffice to merely tack it to my bulletin board, Soph? I can't find my stapler." He dropped another chart in the finished pile.

"What are you doing?" Sophie heard the clattering and shuffling noises on her father's end of the line.

"Charting. The fun administrative side of being a doctor."

"I find it comforting, this attention to detail you put forth, Doctor Dubenko."

"Is that sarcasm I hear, Sophia Marie?"

"Nooooooo. Of course not. Never. Look, as much as I love talking to you, can I call you later tonight Papa? I really want to go back to bed." She yawned for emphasis.

"Don't you have classes today?" His daughter was attending UVA in Charlottesville, Virginia.

"Not until this afternoon. Convenient for those of us who hate the morning hours, no? I love you, Papa. I'll call you tonight, okay?"

"I won't be home, Sophie."

"Jesus, you'd think that by this point in your career you'd be able to get away with not pulling those godawful shifts."

"I'm not on call, baby. I have a date. Besides, my staff would hate me if I tweaked the schedule like that. What's good for the goose is good for the gander and all that."

"You are crazy. Wait, what? Date?"

"I thought you wanted to go back to sleep?"

"Sleep can wait, this should be good. Spill it, doc."

"Why is it that I never get to hear about your dates?"

"Because I never have any worth mentioning. Details, please."

Laughing, Dubenko filled his daughter in on his plans for the evening, and the fact that he had been seeing Allison Chapman for the past couple of months. "She's really nice, Sophie. I think you'll like her."

"What? You want me to meet her? Aren't afraid I'll say something horrid? Is this serious, Papa? What's she like?"

"Why do I feel like we're playing twenty questions? Yes, I'd like you to meet her when you come to visit. I don't plan on ignoring Allison for the two weeks that you are here. As for you saying something horrid, you _will_ be on your best behavior and not act like the vicious little imp that you are."

"You never let me have any fun, Papa."

"I'm sorry you feel that way, baby."

"Seriously, what's this mystery woman like? And why haven't you said anything about her before? Two months, Papa? If I was seeing someone for two months, I'd tell you."

"She's smart, funny, works here at the hospital. I don't know, Sophie. I just like spending time with her. She's…nice."

"You sound happy. Okay, I'll quit grilling you. I want my bed."

"Sweet dreams, Sophia. I can't wait to see you."

"Mmm. I'm calling you tomorrow. I want to hear about this date."

Hanging up the phone, Dubenko went back to signing charts and thinking about his plans for the evening. He didn't hear Dr. Abby Lockhart walk into his office, or notice that she was standing behind his chair glaring daggers at him.

"Susan said you wanted to see me." Abby's lackluster statement startled Dubenko and he spun around in his chair, accidentally elbowing Lockhart in the stomach. "Oomph."

"Lockhart. Sorry. I, uh, I didn't know you were in here. How long have you been standing there?"

Rubbing her stomach and giving him another baleful glare, Abby replied, "Long enough to know that you have a date tonight."

"Eavesdropping is rude, Lockhart."

"Why did you want to see me?"

"I just thought you'd like to apologize for your uncalled-for behavior this morning. I realize that you have a great deal of disdain for those with authority over you, myself in particular; however, that doesn't excuse you from showing some common courtesy to your superiors. Oh, and you can take these back down to Dr. Lewis. She's expecting them."

The brunette resident just stared at him, her arms now full of charts and paperwork. "That's all, Lockhart. You can go." He dismissed her without so much as giving her another look. "I have work to do, Lockhart. Leave."

* * *

Dubenko was sitting by himself at a table near the back of Ike Ryan's. The fact that he was dressed in a turtleneck layered with a sweatshirt gave the impression that he was of a bulkier stature than the actual truth. His back to the door and his attention focused on shredding the label on his beer bottle, he didn't notice when doctors Lockhart and Lewis sat at the adjacent table. It wasn't until he heard his name mentioned that he looked over his shoulder and recognized his colleagues.

"I mean really, Susan. That man is such a creep. I don't know how you can stand to spend time with him outside of the hospital, in your house, even. Aren't you afraid he's going to warp Cosmo?"

"Come on, Abby, he isn't that bad. He's kind of quirky, sure, but he's also brilliant. And a hundred times better than Romano. I know we shouldn't speak ill of the dead, but he was a _real _creep. Not Dubenko. Besides, he's actually great with Cosmo. You should have seen him, sitting on my living room floor, baby on his lap and research materials scattered around them. It was sweet. He didn't even get annoyed when Cosmo snatched his glasses right off his face."

Dubenko smiled softly to himself, recalling the series of papers he and Dr. Lewis had published together. He had enjoyed the evenings spent working with her and getting to know her family.

"You sound like you've got a crush or something, Susan." Lockhart sounded repulsed.

"Hardly. I just don't think he's a bad guy. In fact, Chuck keeps bugging me to invite him over for dinner, I think he wants to play matchmaker."

"Supposedly he has a date tonight. Chuck won't have to sacrifice any of your friends on the altar of Dubenko weirdness." The brunette's sarcasm was biting.

Dubenko turned in his seat and made eye contact with Susan Lewis, letting her know that he had heard every word. The blonde smiled sympathetically before he turned back around.

"Ah, Abby?"

"Fine, you like him. He hasn't sidled up to you to make you his pet project, or tried to coerce you into dinner dates, or even made you into a messenger boy after dressing you down in a humiliating manner."

"You kind of deserved that, sorry."

"What?"

"You went off on a senior attending in the middle of the surgical floor for no reason. And you should probably know that he's sitting right behind us." Susan winced as she watched her friend do the same.

"I need a drink. A big drink. Maybe one with a little umbrella in it."

"Yeah."

Allison Chapman chose that moment to walk past the female doctors and join Dubenko at his table. She came up behind the seated man and wrapped her arms around his shoulders, placing a kiss on his cheek and grinning. "Hello, handsome. Sorry I'm late. In case you were wondering, it is _never_ a good idea to put Jell-o in a centrifuge."

"Chapman, I'm afraid to even ask." He stood up and pulled out a chair for her.

Susan Lewis learned across the table towards Abby and spoke softly. "Hey, she's cute. Looks like I can tell Chuck that Dubenko doesn't need a matchmaker after all."

Abby looked over her shoulder and smirked. "She's also young. What is she? One of the candy stripers?"

"Abby!"

"Tell me I'm wrong about him now, Susan."

Allison cleared her throat and spoke up, her comment directed at Lockhart. "How about if she just tells you what a catty bitch you are? I don't see you out on a date with anyone, so what happened? Did you scare them all off with your oh so pleasant disposition?"

Before Abby or anyone else could say anything, Allison was standing up and addressing Dubenko. "Why don't we go elsewhere? I don't want to continue to offend anyone's sensibilities--besides, we'll be late for the movie if we don't get moving."

Dubenko muttered an apology and farewell to Susan as he passed their table, not even bothering to look at Lockhart who was sitting there, her mouth agape.

"Allison—" Dubenko started to address his date as she stormed down the sidewalk towards his car.

She rounded on him, her eyes flashing with anger. "Lee, how can you just sit there and let her talk about you that way? I don't understand it."

"Allie, it doesn't matter. It's not like it's anything I haven't heard before. Do you honestly thing that Lockhart is the first person to ever think I'm a little odd? Or to call me weird? Let it go." His voice was calm and reasonable, masking the hurt his eyes held.

"I can't let it go. It's rude. And mean. And for God's sake, what about at least respecting your position at the hospital?"

"We aren't at work, Allie. I'm not going to hold her personal opinions against her. Besides, like you said, I'm the one with a charming companion for the evening. She's having drinks with her boss."

"I'm charming?" She grinned up at him.

"And when you are angry, you are really quite attractive." He kissed her nose playfully. "We have a movie to catch. And, um, why was there Jell-o in the centrifuge?"

"I thought you weren't going to ask. I hate lab geeks. They think it's so funny to fill test tubes up with questionable content and see which unsuspecting tech will run them through the standard work up and freak over the results. Don't you dare laugh at me either, doctor."

* * *

It was fairly late when Dubenko dropped Allison off at her apartment and made his way home. When his cell phone rang, the doctor groaned, assuming that it was the hospital wanting him to come in for something. He let out a sigh of relief when he recognized his daughter's number on the display.

"Zdravstvujte! Kak dela?" He smiled to himself as he cheerfully answered the phone for once, waiting for Sophie to find something else to complain about regarding his phone skills. It was an old game and one he enjoyed.

"You have a cold or something Papa?" Sophie didn't speak a word of Russian, other than the foul ones, regardless of how often Lee had tried to teach her. He knew she understood the language perfectly well; she was just stubborn.

"What's up, Sophie Monster?" He sat in his car, now parked in the driveway, as he talked.

"How many times do I have to ask you to stop calling me that?" His daughter feigned annoyance at his pet name for her.

"Three, maybe four million more times. If you are calling to pump me for details about my date, forget it." He remembered all too well just how she had tormented him about his quasi-date with Dr. Lockhart many months earlier and had no desire to repeat the experience.

"Spoilsport. Fine, I won't ask about your date. What about the mystery woman you had the date with? Can I ask about her? What's she look like? How'd you meet? How old is she? Is this serious? Does she put out?" She rambled off a litany of questions.

"Yes I am. And yes you may." Lee laughed as he rapidly answered her questions with as little detail as possible, "Pretty, hospital, twenty-three, maybe, none of your business." He guffawed as Sophie blew a raspberry over the phone in response.

"Wait, what? Please tell me you did not just say twenty-three. Are you dating a med student? A Candy Striper? A patient? Good god, Papa…that's just…you _are_ kidding, right?"

"No I'm not kidding, Sophie. Allison's twenty-three and she's a lab technologist. We've been seeing each other for a few months and I really like her. She's funny and sweet. We have a good time together, Sophie, you'll like her."

"Yeah, I'm sure Papa, considering she's in my peer group. Hey, you know my friend Michelle's single, want her number in case things with Allison don't work out? How about Georgia? You've always said she was cute…dear god. Please tell me you weren't checking her out when you said that. She's my age."

"Sophia, you are really pushing it, young lady. Look, I didn't realize how young she was when we initially started dating, okay? I wasn't intentionally looking to date someone half my age. And even if I were, I would never date one of your friends. Tweedle Dee and Tweedle Dumb give me a headache," he added, referring to the two girls with whom Sophia spent most of her time.

"I still say that's twisted Papa, but whatever floats your kinky little boat."

"Sophie…stop it, okay. Please? Look, it's late and I'm going to bed. I love you. Good night." He didn't really feel up to justifying anything to his daughter at this point.


	3. Chapter 3

The week before Christmas, Dubenko met his daughter at the baggage claim and greeted her with a hug. "I've missed you."

"Of course you have, Papa. I'm just that wonderful." She returned his hug and smiled up at him.

"How was your flight?"

"Great, if you like lots of turbulence and sitting next to some crazy nut who thought we were all going to die any minute. I really enjoyed the way he kept talking about a fiery demise and the smell of burning flesh."

"Ah. Um—" Dubenko really had no reply for that one.

"Yeah. Oh hey, there's my bag." She squeezed through the crowd and snagged her luggage off the turnstile.

On their way to his car, Dubenko fiddled with the identification tag on Sophie's bag. He had hefted the large tote over his shoulder since it was apparently too heavy for his daughter to carry without listing to one side.

"Just what do you have in here, Sophie Monster?"

"A few bricks, Hoffa's body, a small African country. You know, the usual. And don't call me that, I hate it, Papa."

"Um, I was wondering about something Soph—"

"I chopped it up into pieces."

"What?" Dubenko looked at his daughter with a perplexed expression on his face.

"Hoffa's body, that's how I got it into the bag." She winked. "Can I drive?"

"No. I was wondering how you'd feel about Allison joining us for Christmas. I actually have the day off and I thought it would be nice to—"

"Yeah, whatever." She waved her hand dismissively and got in the car.

Sophia Dubenko was furious. _How dare he invite that…that girl to spend Christmas with us? I don't want to make nice with some bimbo that is all of two minutes older than I am, just because my father finally decided he wants to have something warm up his bed at night. Ugh, I don't even want to think about that. Gross. Great, now I'm going to be wandering around with that mental image etched in my brain. _

"I need bleach. And a scrub brush," Sophie muttered to no one in particular.

"What, Soph?"

"Nothing, Papa. So when do I get to meet this Ashley person, anyway? Or are you planning to gift wrap her and stick her under the tree until Christmas morning?"

"Allison. And I thought we'd have dinner tonight. She's meeting us at the house."

"Oh, great!" Sophie answered emphatically.

"Don't be such a smart ass. And drop the attitude."

As he drove back to the house, Dubenko occasionally glanced at his daughter. The fact that she was being so silent bothered him. Normally Sophie talked nonstop. "So, um, where would you like to go for dinner?"

"Oh, I don't know. Ike Ryan's has really good burgers or so I've been told." She glared at him.

_Fantastic. This is going to be a long night. Why did I expect this to go smoothly? I told Allie this was a bad idea. Sophie's in a mood and that never bodes well. Nothing like introducing your girlfriend to your daughter for the first time and knowing there's a distinct possibility that she may eat your girlfriend for dinner._

"I was thinking about something a little nicer, Sophia. Italian, okay?"

"Is that what Alice likes?"

"Allison. And since when do you not like Italian?" He refused to get angry with her over her insistence on getting Allie's name wrong.

"Too many carbs. Atkins, yada yada. Got to watch my girlish figure."

"Don't be absurd. There is no reason for you to be on such an asinine diet. Do you have any idea what kind of damage you can do to your kidneys by maintaining that level of ketoses?"

"I don't need a lecture. I was kidding. You know, joke? Ha ha, funny? It is so easy to get your goat sometimes."

"Then why do you do it, Sophia?"

"Because I can."

"Monster."

"You love me."

Allison was sitting on the front steps when Dubenko pulled into the driveway. _Well, this should be amusing. Just as much fun as trying to intubate yourself. In the dark. With one hand tied behind your back. _ He smiled at her as the redhead walked towards the car.

"Hi, handsome. Hello, Sophie." Allison smiled warmly. "How was your flight?"

"Hi yourself, Amber." Sophie returned Allie's smile with a syrupy sweet one of her own.

Dubenko glared at his daughter and spoke under his breath, "Stop it, Sophia Marie."

Allison shrugged, nonplussed. "It's Allison, actually. Or Allie."

"My mistake. So sorry." Sophie didn't bother to keep the contempt out of her voice.

"Soph, why don't you let Allie sit up front?" His tone let her know that it was not a request.

If the drive to the restaurant was painful, dinner could only be described as excruciating. Sophie went out of her way to make Dubenko uncomfortable. He knew that she was less than thrilled with the fact that he was dating someone so close to her own age. He knew his daughter had a temper and a mean streak. He even knew her propensity to act incredibly immature at times. However, he never expected her to display every last one of her undesirable traits in one fell swoop.

As they were seated and the waiter asked for their drink orders. Sophie leaned over and grinned at Allison. "Hey cool, they have a children's menu! I bet if we ask nicely they'll even give us a couple of crayons."

Allison ignored the jibe and looked questioningly at Dubenko. "So, guess what fun and excitement you missed at the hospital today?"

"Public health officials finally condemned the building?" The sanitation situation still had not been cleared up. The ongoing problem was frustrating to more than one department.

"Like we're that lucky. No. Guess again."

Sophie piped up with a sneer, "There's a problem with physicians trolling for dates in the nursery?"

Dubenko was tempted to kick the teenager under the table to get her to be quiet. "Sophia, what is the matter with you?"

"Nothing. _I'm_ fine. I was just guessing. Sorry for intruding on what is apparently a private conversation. Maybe you'd like me to sit at another table so I don't ruin your date, Papa."

Thankfully, the waiter reappeared to take their orders. "And what can I get you and your lovely daughters this evening?" The waiter addressed Dubenko but was smiling at Sophia.

"Oh, no, I'm an only child." Then, indicating Allison with a nod of her head and speaking softly to the waiter, "She's just his midlife crisis."

Dubenko gritted his teeth and shot an icy look at Sophie before ordering for himself and Allison, who had turned quite red with embarrassment. _I never thought I'd be a proponent for post term abortion, but Sophie is really starting to make a case for it_. _I won't blame Allison if she never speaks to me again. _

As if by unspoken agreement, Dubenko and Allison simply opted to ignore the curly haired teen for the remainder of the meal. They conversed quietly with each other and occasionally held hands under the table. He was too angry to fidget and too concerned with salvaging his chances with Allie to suggest ending the dinner early.

For her part, Sophie simply pushed food around her plate and sent disgusted looks across the table. She was further put into her foul mood by the fact that she could find nothing about Allison to actually complain about. She seemed nice, smart and totally taken with her father. Sophie hated her.

* * *

Allison was standing in the Dubenko kitchen waiting for Lee. She had agreed to pick up the long-haired doctor so that Sophie could have his car for the day. The lab tech was scanning the morning paper when the younger Dubenko wandered into the room.

"Morning Abby!" Sophie didn't even bother to make eye contact as she went straight to the refrigerator.

"Allie. My name is Allie," she muttered, trying to keep the agitation out of her voice.

"Allie, Abby…you both work at the hospital, he's taken you both out to dinner. What's the difference?" Sophie brushed past Allison to retrieve a spoon for her yogurt.

"What?" Allison stared wide-eyed at the pajama-clad teen.

"Hmm? Oh, sorry. I thought you knew about that. My mistake." Sophie smiled sheepishly at the red head.

Allison continued to stare at Sophie as the younger girl ate her breakfast. "What do you mean?"

"Oh, I'm sure it was _nothing._ Papa asked her to work on a paper with him, something for publication purposes. It turned into dinner…hey, weren't you helping him with some research thing when he asked you out the first time, too? Not very original, is he? Anyway, Abby, Dr. Lockhart, she's that really pretty brunette that works in the ER and Papa has really taken a shine to her. I think because she reminds him so much of my mother." She paused for a moment as if in serious thought, then leaned on the counter towards Allison in a conspiratorial manner. "For a while there every conversation I had with him was Abby this and Abby that. Kind of funny that he never really talked about you that way. Then again, you know how Papa is, kind of scatter-brained when it comes to the trivial things in life."

Sophie heard the sounds of her father walking down the stairs and turned to leave the room. "See you later, Alice. There's a hot shower with my name on it."

Allison stood there with a shocked expression on her face, her mind reeling as she listened to father and daughter exchange greetings in the hallway. Dubenko absently kissed her on the cheek when he entered the kitchen.

"Morning, Chapman. Are you ready to go?" He was searching around for his wallet and hadn't bothered to look at her face. Finding it tossed in with the previous day's mail, he slipped the leather billfold into his back pants pocket and looked expectantly at his girlfriend.

She blinked and picked up her keys wordlessly and walked to the front door, leaving Dubenko no choice but to hurry after her.

"Allie?" he queried. "What's the matter? You don't look like you feel well." His soothing tones seemed to fall on deaf ears as she ignored him.

Once they were in the car and well on their way to the hospital, Allison glanced sideways at the surgeon and quietly asked, "How long are you planning on playing games with me, Dr. Dubenko?"

"Playing…wait, what? Since when are we on formal terms here, Allison? Have I done something to upset you?" He began to fidget with his identification badge as he spoke, the nervous habit belying his dismay and confusion.

"When were you planning on telling me about Dr. Lockhart? Are you two planning on publishing any more papers together? What, is that some sort of twisted academic metaphor for screwing each other? Is that why you have had zero interest in getting me in bed? God, no wonder she had such a lovely opinion of you when we were at Ike's!" As she spoke her voice rose until she was nearly shouting.

Dubenko stared at her, horror stricken. He tried to speak, lips moving, but no words would come. _What in God's name is she talking about? Where did she ever get the idea that Lockhart and I were…_his thoughts trailed off as he realized that Sophie had been in a very chipper mood when she had greeted him that morning. She wasn't a morning person by nature; in fact she was usually downright surly when she first woke up. _The little wretch; what the hell has gotten into her? I swear if she's said something to Allie…You'll what? Strangle her? Nice, Lee. _He sighed.

Unfortunately, Allison seemed to interpret this as an admission of guilt on his part. "You know, now I know where Sophie gets it from. I thought she was just having a hard time adjusting to you dating again. Guess I was wrong. I didn't know cruelty was an inherited trait. Maybe we should write a paper about that, what do you think, doctor?"

"Allison—"

"Save it."

"Allie—"

"I don't really want to talk to you right now, okay? I just want to get to work because the sooner I do that, the sooner this goddamned day will be over."

"Will you please—"

"I'm not listening—"

"Let me speak without—"

"To you."

"Allison, be reasonable—"

"Not listening—"

"How mature of you." Irritation was evident in Dubenko's tone.

"You shouldn't be surprised, seeing as how you are dating someone young enough to be your daughter." Her tone was bitter as she snapped back at him.

"Not so long ago you said our age difference wasn't an issue. Should you ever wish to start listening to me and carry on a conversation like an adult, you can certainly feel free to inform me if that has changed of late." He couldn't quite disguise his fear that she'd confirm that accusation.

"I thought it wasn't an issue, but obviously it is, isn't it? What was it that Sophie called me? Your midlife crisis?" She turned her head to glare at him briefly.

"Contrary to what she may believe, my daughter does not know what she's talking about."

"She seemed pretty damned sure of what she was saying this morning, Lee." Allison's hands gripped the steering wheel tighter, her knuckles almost white.

"I don't know what she said to you before I came downstairs, but Allison, it doesn't matter."

"It matters to me. Dammit, I can't fight with you and drive at the same time." At this, Allison pulled over to the side of the road and turned to face him.

"I don't particularly enjoy arguing with you either. I resent the fact that you think I'm playing games here or that I'd intentionally hurt you. I thought you knew me better than that." It was Dubenko's turn to sound hurt.

"I thought I did too, but I was obviously mistaken. How many other women have you gotten to go out with you under the guise of doing research or publishing a paper with you? Enlighten me, I'm really curious."

"I…Allison…" He sighed, closing his eyes and hanging his head before continuing in a soft voice. "I'm sorry if I'm not the most socially adept man, Allison. I never have been. I know research and I know how to write a publishable paper, people…women, not so much."

"What about Dr. Lockhart?"

"There is nothing, has never been anything, going on between Lockhart and I. We had dinner together once, and yes to write up a case. It was a miserable evening for more than a few reasons. End of story."

"But why would Sophie say otherwise?" She searched his face, frowning as she watched a myriad of emotions at play on his features.

"I could hazard a few guesses. I know my daughter. I may seem oblivious to things a lot of the time, but I'm not. Sophie may look like me; may be just as bright in some respects, but she is a lot like her mother as well. She has the same knack for reading people that Marti had. She just seems to know what makes them tick, or what sets them off. I think she knew just what to say to you to press your buttons, Allie, and while she may not have lied to you, she definitely exaggerated. I'm not making excuses for her, believe me she and I are going to have more than a few words this evening…but I can't let all the blame fall on her either."

"So this is my fault?" Allison's eyes flashed with anger and she bristled at the thought that he was blaming her.

"No, it's mine." Dubenko sounded weary, almost defeated. "I'm sure you've noticed that Sophie is somewhat protective of her relationship with me. Territorial may be a better term. We've always been close, and after my wife died, when I wasn't being a complete miserable wreck and shirking my parental responsibilities, we coped with the loss by clinging to each other. For the longest time she was my only confidant. Still is in some regards. I don't have to explain to her what it was like losing Marti, she knows."

He paused, swallowed hard and looked at Allison intently, his hazel eyes filled with pain both old and new. "My little girl has been through hell and back, seen things no child should ever have to see and still turned out relatively well adjusted. No thanks to me, I assure you. I'm not proud of that, and I can't help but sometimes think that had I been there for her the way I should have been that she just might be a little less hostile about things now. I'm sorry, Allie. I know you didn't ask for any of this."

"Lee, I…oh hell." She didn't know what to say.

"You have every right to be angry, I don't blame you. I don't blame you for being angry at Sophie and I definitely don't fault you for being upset with me." Dubenko was once more staring at his hands as he spoke, not wanting to look at his companion. "I just want you to know that I'd never do something like that, to you or anyone else. Think ill of me for being a lousy parent, a socially stunted geek, but please don't think that I'd see another woman behind your back or play those sorts of games, Allie."

She just stared at him as the forlorn doctor slumped in his seat and looked out the window. "Lee, I don't think you are any of those things. Okay, maybe you are a bit of a geek, but I like that about you."

He gave her a wan half smile in response. "Yeah?"

"Yeah." Allison reached over and took Dubenko's hand in hers. "Lee, I'm sorry I overreacted. I should know better than to take anything your daughter says at face value." Realizing how that sounded, Allie winced. "I, uh, I mean that—"

"How do you think she earned her childhood nickname, Allie? I call her Sophie Monster for a reason." Dubenko looked at her, his expression solemn. "Are we done fighting?"

"Yes, and we are also incredibly late for work." Allie kissed his cheek before restarting the car and merging back into traffic. "I'm so dead."

Dubenko took her wrist and looked at his watch. "Actually, you have a fairly normal pulse. I'd say you were quite alive, honey."

"Ha ha. Seriously, have you ever seen the harridan that I call 'Boss'? She likes to eat lowly plebes like myself for breakfast."

"Send her my way if she gets on your case."

"You are not fighting my battles for me, Lee. Forget it. But if you never see me again, you'll know what happened. Tell my roommate she can have my stereo and be sure to feed my goldfish for me."

"She gets your stereo and I get goldfish?"

"I've known Joey longer."

"But she's making you wear a dress with a bow the size of South America on your rear end."

"Fine, you can have the stereo and the fish, okay?"

"What about Joey?"

"You can't have her. Her fiancé would probably shoot you. He's a cop, he carries a gun, you know."

"That's not what I meant. Won't she be jealous about the stereo and the gold fish?"

"You're the one being greedy, doctor darling."

"She can have the fish."

"She doesn't like them."

"Neither do I."

"You've never met them!"

"How does one 'meet' a pair of goldfish?"

"How the hell should I know?"

"You missed the exit."

"I'm so dead."


	4. Chapter 4

If Allison faced any ill consequences for being late to work, she didn't mention them to Dubenko as they both slunk out of the hospital later that evening. Neither one was in the best of moods as they said little on the drive back to Dubenko's house.

"How was your day, Chapman?" Lee Dubenko asked as he got into the compact car.

"I survived. Now I go home and get bombarded with bridesmaid duties. Tomorrow I call in dead." She leaned forward in the driver's seat and let her head come to rest on the steering wheel.

Dubenko reached over and patted her back in sympathy. "You can stay at my place if you want; I have a feeling that Sophie will be spending the evening in her room compiling the many reasons as to why her life sucks and then devising my early termination after I get through talking to her."

"I'd like to stay for that festival of fun, Lee, but I have it on good authority that a certain homicide detective will toss me in the clink if I even think of leaving him to fend for himself with Bridezilla tonight."

"He wanted to marry her, he should get used to it now."

"You have a point. I'm still calling in dead tomorrow."

"That may be problematic when you do decide to go back to work, don't you think?"

"Keep your logic and reasoning to yourself, please."

As they pulled into the driveway, Allison shot a questioning look at Dubenko. "Are you sure you want me here, Lee?"

"She's going to knock it off, Allison, one way or the other. I'm tired of this, really and truly tired of it. She is also going to apologize to you for her churlish behavior."

Lee left Allison in the living room as he headed upstairs to find his daughter. She was, as he had guessed, in her room. Sophie looked up from the book she was reading and gave her father a warm smile. It quickly faded as she saw the incensed look on his face.

"Papa?" She sat up and placed her index finger in the book to mark her place. "What's wrong?"

Dubenko quietly and calmly closed the bedroom door and moved towards the center of the room before speaking. "Why don't you tell me, Sophia Marie?" His hazel eyes narrowed to a steely gaze that settled on the teen.

"Um…yeah, my crystal ball isn't working today, Papa. How about a little clue?"

"I'm not in the mood for your flippancy, Soph. What did you say to Allison this morning?"

"I don't remember. Morning? Hey? Hi? Hello? Something. I've slept since then, I don't really remember. Must not have been that important."

Dubenko crouched down so that he was on equal eye level with his daughter, steadying himself by placing his hands on the bed on either side of Sophie. His voice was low and resolute as he spoke. "Quit playing games with me. I'm not buying the ignorant act. What did you say to her? More significantly, why did you say it?"

Sophie stared at her father, her eyes wide and her bottom lip trembling as she realized just how angry he was. It was seldom that she saw him this enraged, even rarer still that his anger was focused at her. "I…I…Papa, I didn't mean anything by it. I wasn't serious. I—"

"Oh Sophie, I think you did mean it. I think you intentionally set out to upset Allison, insult her and try to drive a wedge between us. You forget just how well I know you. I know how you operate, how you think and I know that you are back pedaling just as fast as your little mind can turn its gears." He emphasized his last words by taping his index finger against her brow. It wasn't a kind gesture. Dubenko chewed his bottom lip as he continued his intense eye contact with his daughter.

Sophie looked at her hands, over her father's shoulder, out the window…anywhere but his eyes as she tried to come up with a response. She started absently plucking at the comforter she was sitting on as she looked around the room, startling when she felt her father's firm, warm hand close over hers. "Papa…I, look, I know you're mad at me, okay? Fine. Why don't you just yell and get it over with? I don't like her. Is that what you want me to say? I don't like her and I don't want to spend time with her. Happy now?"

Dubenko clenched his jaw in response to his daughter's words. "I don't want to yell at you, Sophia. I shouldn't have to. You are an adult, nearly twenty years old, as you like to remind me. And yet, you persist with this utterly juvenile behavior. It's uncalled for, unbecoming and you are better than that. You were raised better than that." He took a deep breath and stood up, releasing her hand as he did so. "I can't make you like Allison, I can't make you spend time with her, but I damned well can make you see the consequences of your actions. Either you grow up and stop this sophomoric campaign you have been on or I'll change your flight arrangements and you can leave tonight. I'm through humoring you; I'm done making excuses for your behavior and I'm done with letting you have free reign over my personal life. It's not up to you, Sophie, who I see and who I don't see. You don't get to make that choice, baby, I do. It's my life."

He stopped talking and looked at his daughter. Noticing the tears running down her cheeks Dubenko pulled a few tissues out of the box on the nearby dresser and handed them to Sophia. "I never used to think anything of the fact that I confided in you, Sophie, that I shared so much of my life with you. I like being able to do that. I want to be able to talk to you about things, but lately I feel like I made a mistake in doing so. You aren't one of my colleagues or peers, you are my daughter and sometimes I think you lose sight of that boundary line. This time you've gone way over it, Soph, and I'm putting an end to it."

Sophia looked up at her father, her teary eyes flashing with anger to match his own. "I can't believe you'd choose her over me. You'd really make me leave? So much for 'This is your home too, Soph. I want you here, for as long as you want to stay.' Then again, I guess you don't need me anymore…do you Papa? You have _Allie _to talk to, to confide in. And better still, here's where I can't compete, you have Allie to keep you company at night. I hope she's good Papa. I hope she's real—"

"Sophia!" Dubenko bellowed in outrage, causing the ranting girl to instantly cease speaking. "I'm not discussing this any further with you. Either you knock it off and apologize to Allison, sincerely apologize, and act like the civilized person your mother and I raised or you will be cutting this visit very short."

"Now you mention Mom? That's rich. Really, after the way you shoved her picture face down in your desk—didn't think I'd notice that, did you? Was that so your precious Allison wouldn't be threatened or was it just easier for you to forget about Mom that way?"

Lee Dubenko rounded on his daughter angrily, his voice dropping to a dangerous growl. "You are really starting to make me angry, Sophia."

"Truth hurts, doesn't it, Papa?"

Dubenko grabbed his daughter by the chin and forced her to look at him as he leaned in close. "You want the truth, Sophia? The truth is that you are a spoiled little girl so used to having things go your way that you can't cope when a situation is out of your control." He let go and ran his hands through his hair in frustration.

Sophia moved back from the edge of her bed and buried her face in her pillows before starting to cry in earnest. Her father had never spoken to her with such vehemence before, never said anything so deliberately hurtful to her and she didn't know how to react.

Not knowing what else to do, Dubenko simply walked out of his daughter's room, closing the door behind him with an audible thud. He stood on the other side of the door, his eyes closed and head lowered. Sophie's sobs, though muffled by pillows and the closed door, still reached his ears. He hated that sound more than anything. Hated that this time, he had caused the tears, the hurt that she was feeling.

* * *

_Lee Dubenko had woken up with a start. It was barely six in the morning and his bedroom was still cloaked in a somber gray light. Shifting slightly on the bed, he looked down at the sleeping rumpled form of his daughter. Just as she had the two previous nights, fourteen-year-old Sophia Dubenko had cried herself to sleep in her father's arms._

_The first night he had let her stay in bed with him, more for his own selfish needs than hers. He didn't want to let her out of his sight, out of his arms. Part of his mind insisted that he was in shock and not thinking rationally after his wife's death. The other part of his mind told the first half to go to hell. _

_The next night, he had held onto the young girl, rocking her and murmuring soothing reassurances into her hair. Once she was asleep he carried her slight form down the hall and put her in her own bed. She woke up hours later screaming in terror. It took Dubenko most of the night to calm her down._

_Last night he didn't have the heart to carry her back to her room again and simply let her stay where she was. He didn't sleep, but lay there and watched Sophie's fitful slumber. Occasionally she'd whimper and mutter in her sleep, and Dubenko would stroke her wild mane of curly hair until she'd settle down again. _

_He couldn't quite imagine the horrors his child was dreaming of, the images that caused her to cry out in her sleep. He wouldn't let himself. Had it only been three days ago_ _that their world had been turned upside down?_ _ Sophie had come home from school and found her mother's beaten and broken body lying lifeless and bloody on the kitchen floor. The random act of violence hadn't merely cost Martina Dubenko her life, but it also left her family raw and devastated. Sophie was Lee's only focus and in the moments when he was alone he was simply numb, lost._

_Turning his head on the pillow, Dubenko inhaled deeply. He was lying on Marti's side of the bed, the place where she'd slept for years. Her pillow still held her scent, the shampoo she used, the lotion, something that could only be defined as Marti. He closed his eyes and pictured his wife, the way she'd curl up on her side facing him at night. He could almost hear her whispered "goodnight" as he pressed his face against the cool linen pillowcase. Just as abruptly, the image changed and he saw her face as it was now, the bones crushed and her hair bloodied and matted. Unrecognizable. _

_He sat up, careful to not wake his daughter, and got out of bed. He knew he wouldn't get any more rest. Letting Sophie sleep, Dubenko showered and dressed. The dark suit he wore reflected the early morning gloom and his mood. _

_Looking at the clock on the nightstand, Dubenko sat next to his daughter and shook her gently. "Baby, wake up. Come on, Sophie Monster, I need you to get dressed. We have to leave soon." Sleepy hazel eyes met his own tired ones and he tried to smile at her, but he couldn't quite manage it. Today he was going to do the hardest thing he had ever faced. He had to bury his wife. He had no reason to smile._

Lee put his hand on the doorknob and thought about going back in to his daughter's room to apologize. Sophie was still crying, but now instead of loud sobs he could hear quiet sniffling. _I'm sorry, baby. The truth does hurt, doesn't it? _He forced himself to walk away and back down the stairs again. Allison was still waiting for him and he was determined not to cave in where Sophia was concerned.

* * *

Allison had been roaming around the somber living room of the Dubenko household while father and daughter argued on the floor above. She studied the picture frames the skilled surgeon had haphazardly placed around the room on end tables and the mantle as she tried to ignore the muffled sound of his irate voice. She never would have guessed that Dubenko had that sort of temper. He was always so easy going and genial.

She noticed that many of the photographs in the room were older and mostly of his daughter, Sophia. There were several shots of father and daughter together over the years, always smiling, always in each other's arms. Allison couldn't help but smile as she looked at the images; they were evidently very close. Moving over to the large roll top desk that sat against the far wall, she noticed a picture frame that had been turned face down on the blotter. Curiosity getting the better of her, Allison turned it over and considered the subject matter with mixed emotions.

A woman, maybe in her mid thirties, was sitting in the sand and looking out towards crashing waves on the horizon. The glass covering the photograph was smudged with fingerprints, as if someone had been caressing the woman's face. Allison knew that someone must have been Lee. She couldn't help but wonder if this woman or the younger one upstairs was the one with whom she was competing. Or why she felt compelled to do so in the first place.

She looked up at the ceiling as she heard Lee Dubenko bellow his daughter's name and couldn't help but wonder just what was being said between the two. Looking back at the photo still in her hands, Allison began to really examine the subject matter. Martina Dubenko wasn't what she'd classify as a beautiful woman, but there was something striking about her. Maybe it was the look of contentment she had on her face, almost a sense of inner peace that radiated from her as she studied something just out of the camera's view.

Allison decided that Sophia definitely took after her father in the looks department. Martina's hair was long and straight, albeit windblown in this picture. Her face was pleasant and round; she obviously hadn't been a slender woman. Allison wasn't sure why she was critiquing the deceased woman's physical appearance, mentally noting how different the late doctor appeared in contrast to what she had imagined. Compared to herself.

She heard a door close and a few minutes later the sound of footfalls in the stairwell. Allison was still standing at the desk with the photograph in her hands when Lee Dubenko entered the room. She momentarily held her breath as he moved towards her, surprised when he merely wrapped his arms around her waist, hugging her from behind. He kissed the side of her neck before resting his cheek against her hair and sighed deeply. Dubenko only then seemed to notice the picture frame she held. Silently he took it from her grasp and sat it back on the desk blotter, this time face up, then he pulled the roll top closed.

He stood there, in front of her, looking lost in thoughts of someplace, or someone far away. Dubenko's hands went to the hem of his sweater, which he tugged and twisted as his eyes focused once again on the slender woman watching him. He chewed the inside of his cheek and continued to contort the material in his hands as if the physical activity would somehow erase the awkwardness of the moment.

"I don't know about you, Chapman, but I need a drink." He finally spoke and adjusted his glasses, giving her a weak smile.

Allison followed the curly haired man into the kitchen and leaned against the counter as he searched the overhead cabinets. Seeming to give up his quest, Dubenko pulled two coffee mugs off the shelf above the sink and set them at her elbow. He then pulled a slender black and silver labeled bottle from the back of his freezer.

She raised her eyebrows in surprise as she recognized the somewhat expensive brand of vodka. "Stoli?"

"Stolichnaya elit…if you are going to imbibe, may as well be worth drinking." He opened the bottle and looked dubiously at the coffee mugs. "My Dedushka would have my hide for doing this."

"Your what?" She fixed him with a puzzled look.

"Dedushka, grandfather. First for pouring vodka into my coffee cup and then for not having any rye bread in the house."

"Hey, you're talking to someone who actually likes drinking that wine in a box stuff. Usually out of paper cups."

"That's disgusting, Chapman. Remind me to introduce you to a good bottle of wine sometime." He offered her one of the mugs that contained no more than a shot's worth of liquid. "Za vashe zdorov'ye!" He raised his mug to hers, clinking them together, then tossed back the drink in one gulp.

"Bless you?" She quirked one eyebrow at him as she sipped the vodka.

Dubenko laughed. "It means 'to your health', Allie. Za vashe zdorov'ye." He repeated the toast once more.

"Oh. Is that Russian? You speak it fluently?" She had wondered about the origin of his last name but never asked.

"I can muddle through. My Dedushka, my father's father, immigrated when he was a teenager. He tried to teach me the language but my mother usually thwarted his attempts. Of course that only made me all the more determined to learn." He had a mischievous light in his eyes when he grinned at her.

"Rotten child?" Allison teased as she played with the cold bottle of alcohol.

"Willful. It runs in the family." He looked towards the stairs as he said this, thinking of his own headstrong offspring. "Between her mother's Irish temper and my Russian pride, she really didn't stand a chance."

"Is she okay?" Allison couldn't help but feel bad for the girl after hearing Dubenko's muffled invective. She realized that she never wanted to be on the receiving end of his temper.

"She will be. Sophia never has liked being told she was wrong. Nor is she particularly fond of having to share my attention with anyone." He gave Allison a meaningful look and reached out to caress her cheek. "The former will never change, but she is going to have to learn to deal with the latter."

She turned her head to kiss the palm of his hand gently and murmured against his warm skin, "Thank you."

Dubenko dropped his hand to take the bottle of vodka from Allison. As he poured more of the chilled drink into their cups he spoke in an offhand manner. "There's an old Russian tradition stating that an open bottle must be finished." He handed her one of the mugs and touched it gently with his own. "Za vas. To you."

"Za vas." She repeated the words slowly and gave him a shaky smile as she again sipped at the drink.

"Ochen' harasho, very good. You know, Allie, vodka should be tossed back, not sipped." He went to refill her mug and she covered the top with her hand. "It's also very rude to decline to drink with your host."

"I have to drive home, Lee. Besides, last time I checked we were in Chicago, not Moscow."

"Kiev. My Dedushka was from Kiev. As for driving home, forget it, Chapman. It's late and you've already had enough to drink to impair your motor skills." He removed her hand from the top of the mug and poured another round.

He then set his own mug on the counter along with the bottle. Going to the refrigerator, he pulled out a block of cheese and a bunch of grapes that he laid on a clean plate.

Allison watched as Dubenko carefully and quickly sliced the cheese into thin slivers and arranged them around the perimeter of the plate. "Are you trying to get me drunk?"

"You were calling in to work dead tomorrow anyway, as I recall." He was wrapping a grape in a piece of cheese as he talked, then popped it in her mouth as she started to protest. "Here, eat something, Chapman."

He picked up the plate of food and their mugs and headed into the living room. "Bring the bottle with you."

She followed him into the next room and sat with him on the sofa. He had taken his shoes off and placed one sock covered foot in her lap, the other resting on the floor as he sat sideways on the overstuffed piece of furniture. Dubenko smiled at her as he meticulously peeled a grape, dropping the skin back on the plate and popping the fruit into his mouth.

Allison had to laugh; she'd never seen him quite this relaxed before. The alcohol must have been having an effect on the normally reserved man. She idly wondered just how it was affecting her as well. "You aren't really serious about finishing this whole bottle, are you?"

"No, but it could be fun to try. Are you game, Allie?" He wiggled his toes at her and gave her an expectant look.

Shoving his foot off her lap, she picked up her coffee mug and tossed back the contents in one gulp. She then sputtered until her eyes watered and Dubenko moved to pat her on the back.

"Careful. That takes some practice."

"And how long have you been practicing, oh wise one?"

He looked thoughtful for a moment. "I was sixteen the first time Dedushka asked me to share a bottle with him. I think he managed to get four shots in me before I hit the floor. I woke up the next morning convinced that my head was going to fall off. When my mother eventually found out, I wished that it had."

Feeling more than a little tipsy herself at this point, Allison giggled at him. "Wow, my grandpa was never that cool."

"I think he did it mainly to get a rise out of my mother. He never cared for her much."

"Why?"

"Back then? I don't really know. Later, mostly because of the way she treated Marti." Dubenko was pushing food around on the plate and not looking at Allison as he spoke. "My mother didn't approve of my choice in a girlfriend and later on, wife. A farmer's daughter who put herself through school by way of scholarships, grants, loans and working part time offended upper class socialite sensibilities. She was never willing to see Marti for the remarkable person she had been."

"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to pry." Allison felt bad for bringing up what was obviously an unpleasant subject for him.

"Don't be. It isn't your fault that Felicia Windham—she never did take my father's name—is such a shallow creature."

"What was she like?"

"My mother?"

"No. Marti."

Lee Dubenko looked at Allison, his hazel eyes teaming with mixed emotion. "Allison…please, don't ask me about Marti. I can't really think about her without thinking about losing her and I don't want to revisit that horror tonight." He poured himself another drink, a more generous one than the previous three he had consumed.

Allison looked remorseful for letting her curiosity get the better of her, but she couldn't help but wonder just how Dubenko had been widowed. Had she been ill? Was there an accident? Sighing, she simply placed her head on his shoulder.

"I'm sorry, Lee, I can't seem to say anything right tonight." She took the mug from him and drank from it before handing it back. "Can I make a bit of a confession?"

He drained the mug and looked at her, his curiosity piqued. "What sort of confession, Chapman?"

"You know earlier, when you were speaking Russian? I thought that was really sexy." She blushed and continued on. "Would you say something else?"

Thoughtful, Dubenko sat back on the sofa and pulled her with him. One arm wrapped around her, he held her close and whispered in her ear. "Ti takaya chudesnaya. Vy menya panimayete? Mne nikogda v zshizni nebeelo tak harasho."

The warmth of his breath in her ear caused Allison to shudder as he spoke softly. The dulcet tones of his voice made the unfamiliar words sound melodic and pleasant. "Will you tell me what that means, Lee?"

"I said that you are wonderful and I want you to understand that I haven't felt this good in a long time." He was looking at her now, running his fingers through her hair. "Come here, Chapman." Dubenko tilted his head to one side and kissed her softly. He began trailing warm wet kisses along her jaw and down the side of her neck.

Allison shifted in his embrace and moved to return his kisses, but instead of kissing the affectionate man she knocked heads with him. "Ow."

"Let's try that again, shall we, Chapman?" Dubenko murmured as he took hold of her face and tilted her chin up to kiss her once more.

"You are much better at this than me." As if to prove her point, she again moved to kiss his mouth and got his chin by mistake.

"No more vodka for you, lightweight," he teased and captured her mouth with his.

"Mmm, then what are we going to do? I thought we had to finish the bottle."

"We tried. We failed. We can try something else."

"Like what?"

"Maybe I'll teach you some Russian instead."

"I was a pretty lousy student in school. Never did manage to learn much in Spanish class."

"Maybe you just need a good teacher."

"Are you a good teacher?"

"I do hold the title of professor at the Virginia Medical Center University."

"Are you going to make me call you Professor?"

"Would you?"

"I think I'd get awfully confused, Doctor. Professor. Doctor Professor. See?"

"You're cute when you're drunk, Allie."

"I'm not drunk. Just…fuzzy."

"Well then, you are cute when you're fuzzy."

"I thought you were going to teach me some Russian."

"Oh, well, let me see." Dubenko studied her carefully for a moment and then gave her a lopsided smirk. He reached for the top button of her blouse and unfastened it. "_Nol. Adin. Dva. Chityri_." As he spoke each word, he undid another button. He never took his eyes off Allison's face the entire time he was counting.

"I'm going to run out of buttons here, Lee."

"That's okay, we still have my shirt to work with. _Pyat. Shest. Sem. Vosim. Devit. Desit_." As he popped the last button, he looked down at her now open shirt and stared at her appraisingly before slipping his hands under the soft cotton fabric and caressing her bared skin.

Allison inhaled sharply at the touch of his warm hands on her torso. "Now what are you doing?"

"I thought that was rather obvious." His left hand was sliding up her back. He pushed her back gently until the redhead was lying on the sofa and he was leaning over her. "I'm bored with counting—"

The two, in their somewhat inebriated state, fumbled and squirmed on the sofa as they tried to clumsily undress each other. They finally settled for groping and kissing after Dubenko nearly fell off the sofa while trying to unbutton his own shirt as he straddled a giggling Allison.

"The last time I did this I was in high school." She laughed as he swore under his breath as he knocked his glasses off his face while reaching to turn off the lone lamp in the room.

"I was too busy trying to muster up the courage to even talk to a girl in high school, let alone undress her, Chapman."

"Well, I'm glad you got over that stumbling block, Doctor." She pulled him down until they were nose to nose. "Know what the best part of making out like this is? No parents to catch us."

They both neglected to remember Dubenko's daughter upstairs as they laughed quietly and continued to mutually explore each other with hands and mouths. It wasn't until much later, after they had fallen still in a tangle of half worn clothing, entwined limbs and throw pillows that the stray thought occurred to the doctor. Unfortunately he was to tired to really be concerned about it as he pressed his face to Allison's neck and drifted off into a drunken slumber.


	5. Chapter 5

"God, Papa! If you are going to do that kinky shit, why can't you do it in your bedroom? I think my fragile psyche has now been permanently damaged." The sharp, and overly loud, voice of Sophia Dubenko caused both Allison and Lee to stir, not without protest.

Lee Dubenko opened one eye and looked balefully at his daughter. "Keep your voice down."

Sophie smirked as she took in the scene before her. Noticing the nearly empty bottle of vodka on the coffee table and the discarded articles of clothing, she shook her head. "Really, Papa. I hadn't realized you'd become such a depraved sex fiend." She smirked as she walked over to the windows.

"Sophia Marie Dubenko, you touch those blinds and I will disown you."

She had already pulled them open, causing her father and his companion to moan in protest and squint painfully in the bright morning sun. "Oops. Sorry Papa. My hand slipped."

"Go. To. Your. Room." Dubenko bit off each word carefully as a sharp pain rang through his head.

"Morning to you too, Papa." Sophia laughed as she walked out of the room. Lee could have sworn he heard her singing to herself as she climbed the stairs.

"Lee, no offense, but I hate her. I really, really hate her." Allison groaned and pressed her face into the upholstered arm of the sofa.

"None taken, Chapman." Dubenko was carefully trying to untangle himself and sit up. A wave of nausea made him rethink his efforts almost immediately. "Do you think you could move a little to the left, I can't breathe. Who's idea was it to spend the evening drinking again?"

"Yours."

"I was afraid of that."

"Where's my bra?"

"I'm laying on it." Dubenko winced as he reached beneath himself to tug on the offending undergarment. "I think I punctured something. Like my lung."

* * *

Later, while Allison was upstairs in the shower, Dubenko was trying his best to concentrate on his coffee and ignore the jibes cheerfully coming from his daughter as they stood in the kitchen. His head was pounding, neck was stiff, and his stomach was doing unnatural things like somersaults.

"Please just tell me you didn't actually have sex on the couch because I don't think I'll ever be able to watch television in there again."

"Sophia. Please. Not. So. Loud." Dubenko was rubbing his forehead and wincing. "It's really none of your business, anyway."

"Yeah well, I sure as hell got an eyeful of 'none of my business' this morning, didn't I? Remember when I was, what, eight or nine and I walked in on you and Mom going at it? This? Well, this was ten times worse." Sophia continued to rattle on about the atrocity of seeing her father half naked with his girlfriend in a similar state, sprawled across the living room furniture, as she began pulling food out of the fridge.

"What are you doing, Soph?"

"Making breakfast. I'm hungry. Bacon and eggs sounds really good. You know, completely unhealthy and all. Eggs fried right in the bacon grease, sunny-side up, just a little runny so that they kind of just slide right across the plate. Or down your throat for that matter…want some?" She was grinning at her father who was now slightly greenish in appearance.

"Stop talking or I'm going to throw up. On you." Lee Dubenko put his partially emptied coffee mug on the counter and walked out of the room slowly and collapsed once more on the sofa. "My child is a monster."

He didn't bother looking up when he felt a hand on his back a few minutes later. "Mmm…baby? You won't hold her behavior this morning against me, will you?" he mumbled into the upholstered cushion.

"Don't be silly. I'm sorry, Papa. I guess you really are a bit hung over, huh? Here, I made you some toast and a Bloody Mary. You'll feel better." She set the food on the coffee table and patted his back again.

"Sophie? I'm sorry, I thought you were Allie." Dubenko winced, realizing his error too late.

"What? I…her…what? You call her 'baby' now, too? That's fucking beautiful, Papa. I thought I was your baby. Me…you know, your daughter? The one you've called that for almost twenty years now? Here I am, feeling bad for giving you a hard time and trying to make it up to you and all you want is your god damned shit-faced cum guzzling penis receptacle of a girlfriend!" Sophia's voice had reached an eardrum shattering pitch as she lambasted her father.

"Sophia Marie! I suggest you select your next words very carefully. In fact they better start with 'I'm sorry' and end with "I'll never use that foul language in your presence ever again.' I will not have you speaking that way about Allison or anyone else I choose to spend my time with, do you understand me? I thought we discussed this last night." Dubenko was now standing toe to toe with the seething girl, doing his best not to completely lose his temper or his stomach.

"I'm sorry that you don't have a clue Papa, and don't worry, I'm leaving so I'll never use that foul language in your presence. Ever again."

"Sophia—"

"I hate you." Sophia stormed out of the room, passing Allison on the stairs. "And I really hate you. It isn't enough to date him, is it? You have to totally push me out of the picture too. I hope you two have a very merry Christmas together."

At the slamming of the door Allison managed to wipe the shocked expression off her face and join Lee in the living room. "Did I miss something here?"

He was standing motionless in the center of the room, a look of utter disbelief on his features. When he turned to speak to his companion his face crumbled and his voice wavered. "I'll never manage to do anything right by her, will I? Here she was trying to apologize and I may as well have slapped her across the face in response."

"You know, Lee, she could probably stand to be slapped." Allison's mood was no better than his own. Her head was throbbing and she felt as if she were being attacked yet again for no reason.

"My daughter just told me she hates me. I think she may have actually meant it." He looked like a wounded animal standing there, pained and confused.

Allison moved to put her arms around the hurt man only to have him pull away. "Lee? I'm sorry if my comment was out of line. Look, I don't know what exactly her problem with me is, or what her problem in general is, but I can't see how you could possibly handle things any differently."

He wasn't listening to her. Instead, his attention was focused on the staircase and the sounds of Sophia bustling around in her room. It sounded as if she was slamming drawers and throwing things, her activity mingled with the sounds of her crying.

"Maybe I should go." Allison said quietly.

"I think that would be for the best." Lee looked at her for a moment, his expression thoughtful. "Allie? I'll call you?"

"Sure." She kissed him quickly and gathered her things.

* * *

Sighing, Dubenko made his way up the stairs to his daughter's room. He was dreading the conversation that was about to take place, but for different reasons than the evening before. Last night he had known what to say. Now he was simply at a loss as to how to rectify a situation that was quickly spiraling out of control. He was afraid that he was not only going to botch up his budding relationship with Allison, but that he was going to irreparably damage his bond with his daughter. He knew he would eventually get over Allie if things didn't work out, but he'd never forgive himself if Sophia no longer wanted him in her life.

Knocking softly at the closed door, Dubenko steeled himself for another angry outburst from the one person who could truly still break his heart. "Sophie, it's Papa. Can I come in, please?"

"Why? Want to yell at me some more? Go away. I'm packing. I'm sure Allie, I mean your precious 'Baby' needs you anyhow." Her bitter voice cut him to the core.

"Baby, Sophia, please…I just want, I want to talk to you and not through this damned door." Dubenko leaned against the doorframe as he continued to speak, his voice low and soft. "Baby, I don't want you to leave. Not like this. Not angry with me. Sophie…" He continued to plead with her from out in the hallway for what seemed like ages, to no avail. Hanging his head in defeat, Dubenko went into his own room and gently closed the door before lying across his bed and burying his face in the pillows.

He took his glasses off and set them on the pillow before rolling over to stare at the ceiling. Dubenko squeezed his eyes shut and took a deep, quivering breath before exhaling slowly. He could feel the tears burning behind his eyelids as he struggled to quell the raging turmoil inside of him. He rarely became this overwhelmed, but when it did happen there had always only been one person who could calm his fears. With a few simple words, a touch, or merely her presence Marti had always been the calm center to his emotional storms. _Marti. Oh, Marti, what am I doing? Beautiful, if I've ever needed you, now's the time. I've made a royal mess of things and I have no idea how to fix them. I know you'd be able to set things right. I've always envied you that talent. _

"Marti," his voice barely more than a whisper, Lee gave into his old habit of speaking to his late wife as if she were in the room with him. It was something he hadn't allowed himself to do for many months. "Marti, how is it that I can be so damned smart when it comes to medicine and such an idiot when it comes to being a father?"

He wiped at the corners of his eyes with the pad of his thumb, then paused to study the wetness on his skin. "I don't think she even realizes just how much I love her. I know I say the words a lot. I hug her as often as I can. Call when I have the time. But it never feels like enough. I know she's never forgiven me for the way I acted when you went away. I all but abandoned her. Then I moved to Chicago and even though I asked her to come with me, I knew she wouldn't. I still left. And now, she feels like I don't want her at all. What is it? Three strikes and you're out?"

Hugging a pillow to his chest, Dubenko swallowed hard. "Marti, I can't be out. I simply can't. I need her. Sophie is all I have left of you. I can't lose you both. I just can't—"

The last time he had seriously argued with Sophie had been the day of Martina's funeral. The traumatized girl had steadfastly refused to go to the memorial service for her mother. He felt as helpless now as he had back then, trying to reach out to his daughter and failing miserably. Back then she had still been a child and was unable to cut him out of her life. Now he didn't have that safety net and he was scared of what that meant. If Sophie really wanted to, she could all but pretend he didn't exist. She lived on the east coast and while she appreciated it, she didn't need his financial support; there really was nothing but love to connect and hold them together.

_But if she hates me, I don't even have that. _The solitary thought kept repeating itself in his mind. It tore at his insides, pummeled his gut and broke his heart. Choking on the tears he wouldn't let himself cry, Dubenko desperately hoped for a way to salvage things. He sadly debated calling Allison and telling her that things were over. As much as he cared for the young woman he wasn't about to lose his daughter for someone whom he wasn't even sure loved him. Or ever would. He thought about going back down the hall to Sophia's room and begging her to talk to him. He thought about how close happiness had finally seemed again and just how miserable he currently was.

"Am I supposed to be alone, Marti? Is that it? Maybe I wasn't meant to be loved. Maybe I wasn't meant to be happy." He thought about the fact that he had been an only child. His father died when he was young, his mother was not the affectionate sort. Growing up he had always been a loner amongst his peers. He'd had his schoolwork for company, volumes of literature for companions. Sure he had had friends and acquaintances, but there wasn't anyone close to him. He had Marti for a while--the best years of his life had been with her. Even she was taken from him. He had lost Dedushka just before he and Marti were married. Possibly the only other person that had ever truly made Lee Dubenko feel loved had been his grandfather. And now his daughter had said those awful words to him. _"I hate you." _He could still hear the poisonous tone of her voice. He didn't doubt the sincerity for a moment.

A soft knock sounded on his door. At first Dubenko thought he was hearing things. Again there was a knock, a little louder, followed by his daughter's voice. "Papa? Can I come in?" She didn't wait for a response before opening the door.

Looking at her father curled up on the bed, a pillow to his chest and his glasses off Sophia could tell that he'd been crying, or doing a very poor job of trying not to, she thought. "Are you crying?" Her voice was soft as she walked into the darkened room.

He blinked and wiped at his eyes once more before sitting up. With a customary jerk of his head he tossed his curly hair off his forehead before answering his recalcitrant daughter. "No, just, just resting. What is it, baby?" He studied her face hoping to divine what she might be thinking.

"I um, I was wondering if we could talk…" she trailed off as she studied the floor.

Patting his bed, Lee tried to smile. "Sure. Come here, Soph. Come here."

As the petite teen sat next to him, the doctor couldn't help but pull her against his chest for a hug. "I love you, baby." He knew he was squeezing her too tightly but he didn't care, he just continued to hold her, afraid that if he let go she'd change her mind.

"Papa, I can't breathe." She pushed against his chest with her hands until he loosened his grip. "I wanted to say I was sorry for what I told you downstairs. I don't hate you Papa. I don't. I promise." She exhaled slowly and when she spoke again she sounded ashamed. "I just wanted to hurt you the way you hurt me."

He leaned over to the nightstand and switched on a lamp. In the now brightly lit room, he squinted for a moment before looking at his daughter. "Well, Sophia, you achieved your goal and then some. Do you have any idea how badly that stung me? I can't imagine anything that I have ever done, or failed to do, that has earned me that sort of disrespectful and outright malicious treatment from you. I have done nothing but love you from the moment you were born. Before then, really, I loved the concept of you from the moment your mother first told me she was pregnant. You may not be happy with me right now, you may be angry with me, though I don't really understand why, and you may not like the changes in my life, but what you said was uncalled for."

He took her small hands in his much larger ones as he continued. "I didn't mean to hurt you Sophia, and if I did I'm sorry. Very sorry. The last thing I want to do is cause you any pain. But I really need you to understand something here, Sophie. This is my life, not yours. I'm calling the shots here. I don't interfere with your life on this level and I never would. I want, I deserve the same respect and courtesy from you, baby. You don't have to like it, but that's the way it is. Be as angry as you want with me, that's your right. And if you really think it's the best thing for you, go home. I won't stop you. I personally think it's the wrong solution, running away from your problems instead of trying to work them out. It's also the incredibly immature thing to do." He squeezed Sophie's hands and gave her a weak smile when he noticed her eyebrows reaching into her hairline. "I know what you're thinking, and the irony isn't lost on me either, kiddo. I know that I have the habit of, if not running away from my problems then at least avoiding them like the plague. Look where that's gotten me, Sophie. I'd rather see you learn from my mistakes than repeat them." He took a breath and let go of her hands. "I'm not going to lecture you any more. I've said all I can. The ball's in your court. Stay and handle things like the adult that you are or go home to Richmond and sulk like a child. Your call."

Dubenko watched his daughter for a long moment. She hadn't said a word, just stared at him. "Sophia? Are you okay?"

She nodded mutely and stood up. The younger Dubenko got halfway across the room before turning around and walking back to the bed. Sophia leaned over and gave her father a tight hug and kissed his cheek before leaving his bedroom.

Lee heard her walk down the hall and back into her room, the soft click of the door closing and then silence. He let out a long breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding. Running his hands through his hair, Dubenko let out a penitent chuckle and then pantomimed banging his head against the bedroom wall.


	6. Chapter 6

It had been a standing tradition in his household to decorate the tree on Christmas Eve when he was growing up, and one that he insisted on keeping when he married Marti so many years ago. Dubenko was in the garage on a stepladder handing boxes of decorations to his daughter when the doorbell rang.

"Sophie, will you get that? It's probably Allie." He was attempting to grab a box that was just out of his reach, and he mentally cursed his small stature for the umpteenth time that evening.

"Yeah, or it's Santa's motley crew of angry elves come to demand cookies and milk." She carried a stack of boxes into the house with her and set them near the large evergreen that dominated one side of the living room.

The doorbell sounded again as Sophie was reaching for the deadbolt. "Holy hell, give me a minute, will you?" She yanked open the door and gave Allison a weak smile. "Oh, hi. Papa's in the garage."

"Were you expecting someone else?" Allie had her arms full of packages wrapped in colorful paper.

"Depends. Are any of these for me?" She helped the redhead out and took a few boxes from her.

"Maybe." She sat the packages on the sofa and turned to study the bare tree. "I can't believe you guys haven't decorated that thing yet. Poor naked Christmas tree. Ours has been up since the day after Thanksgiving."

Dubenko had come into the room with the last of the decorations and grinned. "That's because you cheat and put up a fake tree. Completely sacrilegious, Chapman. Shame on you."

"Hey, my roommate is allergic to pine. Besides, it's so pretty and festive. And there's no sap oozing all over the place or needles falling out constantly." As she spoke she maneuvered around the boxes and gave Lee a kiss. "Merry Christmas, handsome man."

"Oh, barf."

"Sophia, shut up."

"Merry Christmas to you too, Papa."

"So, um, where do you plan to start with decorating this tree? It's huge." Allison was trying to defuse the situation before it got out of hand. The relationship between the three of them was tenuous at best.

Dubenko squeezed Allie's shoulder, letting her know that he appreciated her efforts at distracting his argumentative daughter. "Lights go on first." He looked down at the box tucked under his arm and screwed up his face for a moment before handing the box to Sophie. "Actually, first, Sophie gets to untangle the lights. Chapman, why don't you come into the kitchen with me, there's some cookie dough that needs to be baked."

Sophia shot her father a dirty look as she dropped to the floor with the box filled with tangled lights. "I wasn't even here last year, why should I have to untangle the mess you made?"

Her father wisely ignored her and, taking Allison's hand, led her into the kitchen where true to his word there was a large bowl of cookie dough resting on the counter and several baking sheets lined with wax paper.

"You know, Lee, I told you a while ago that I wasn't much of a cook. I'm even worse when it comes to baking." She watched as he pulled an apron over the top of his dark wool turtleneck and tied the loose strings behind his back.

"Hmm? Oh, I wasn't going to make you do this, Allie. I just wanted some company." He gave her a smile as he took a lump of dough and began rolling it flat on a floured section of the counter. "However, if you'd like to help decorate…"

Allison had already started to dig into a bag of holiday colored M&Ms as Lee was talking to her. "Only if you don't mind mutant gingerbread men. I am so not the artiste."

"And you think I am?" He laughed as he handed her a cookie cutter. "Here, just start laying them out on the wax paper. I'll be right back."

Dubenko disappeared into the hall before she could respond and headed upstairs. Allison looked at the flat dough and the cookie cutter in her hand for a moment before shrugging and pressing the metal into the giving substance. She was carefully peeling each of the little men out of the dough and laying them in neat lines when he came back into the kitchen.

"Close your eyes, Allie." His voice was soft and warm as he spoke into her ear.

She felt his arms come around her body and she instinctively leaned back into his embrace. There was a rustle of paper and she felt the gentle pressure of his lips on the nape of her neck as he planted a light kiss on her sensitive skin.

"Merry Christmas, sweetheart." He squeezed her tightly.

"Lee? I thought we were going to exchange gifts after we finished the tree and had dinner." She looked at the small square box he was holding up in front of her.

"We are, but I wanted to give you this while we were alone. It might not go over too well with the Sophie monster." He rested his chin on her shoulder and swayed back and forth slightly. "Open it." He sounded like an excited child who was overly proud of his accomplishments.

Allison's mind raced as she pondered what could be in the package. It was a fair sized container and as she unwrapped it she saw the telltale blue of a Tiffany's box. "Lee—"

"Just open it, Chapman." He kissed her neck again.

Doing as he requested, she lifted the lid and pulled aside the layers of tissue paper. In the bottom of the box was a silver key fob with her initials engraved on it. Attached to the ring was a small brass house key. Allison picked up the weighted metal object and felt how heavy it was. Surprised, she turned and looked at Dubenko.

"Lee…it's lovely. But I don't understand—" She gave him a confused look.

"It's a key to the house, Allison. You spend so much time here that I figured you'd like to be able to come and go as you please. But, um, there's something else in there as well." Dubenko took the box from her and removed the remaining paper. With his nimble fingers he withdrew a delicate gold chain and held it before his girlfriend. Dangling from the center was a pendant with unidentifiable markings on it.

"I saw this and thought of you, Milaya moya." He studied her face intently for a moment before moving behind her. "Pull your hair up for a moment, Chapman." He worked the clasp on the necklace and fastened it around her neck. Dubenko then took her by the shoulders and turned her to face him. He straightened the necklace so that it lay properly around her throat, the pendant dipping down into the open neck of her blouse. "I hope you like it."

"It's beautiful, Lee, but what does it say?" She was fingering the pendant and running her fingers over the odd characters.

"It's your name, Allie. In Russian."

"I don't know what to say, Lee. Thank you. I'm just…wow. Thank you." She was smiling at him, thinking just how lucky she was to have someone so thoughtful and sweet in her life. "I, um, take it that it's the house keys you don't want her to know about?"

He nodded before pulling her against him for a brief kiss. "She's finally acting civil around you for a change, I'd rather not tempt fate."

"Hey, love birds? We going to decorate this tree or not? And stop with the kissy face, I thought there were cookies being baked in here. Really, must I do everything myself?" Sophie was standing in the doorway, her hands on her hips. She was grinning at her father as she teased, "Unless there happens to be mistletoe hanging from the ceiling in your vicinity, I don't want to see any more smooching."

Dubenko looked at his daughter for a long moment then turned back to the girl in his arms. "She doesn't want us to kiss anymore, Allie."

"So I heard." Allie patted his cheek in sympathy.

"Oh wait, my house. My rules." Dubenko grinned and bent Allison backwards over his arm, kissing her deeply.

"You suck." Sophie elbowed passed the two and picked up a tray of cookies. "Mind moving so that I can bake these little guys?"

After Sophie managed to get the trays of cookies into the warmed oven and Dubenko managed to steal a few more kisses, the trio made their way into the living room. Sophie had managed to untangle the numerous strands of lights and had plugged them in to check for burned out bulbs. The miniature beams of multi colored light gave the room a warm glow. His daughter had also put some Christmas music on the stereo. The deep voice of Johnny Mathis belted out old holiday standards as Dubenko began sorting through boxes of ornaments and garland.

Watching her father become lost in his task, and memories of past Christmases, Sophie winked at Allison and picked up a long strand of lights. Stooping to kiss the top of her father's head she also began winding the lights around his legs as he sat sprawled on the thick carpet.

"What are you doing, Sophie monster?" he asked without looking up from the ornaments he was currently placing on little metal hooks.

"Oh, nothing much, Papa. Just making things a little more festive." She snorted as Allie dumped a tangle of garland over his head. "Hmm, now all he needs are a few ornaments."

"How about these?" Allie giggled as she took the ornaments out of Lee's hands and stuck hooks through his sweater. "Doesn't he look cute?"

"Adorable." Sophie nodded in agreement.

"Absurd." Dubenko frowned.

"Oh hush Papa, don't be a Grinch. Now where did I put the camera?"

"Sophia…no." He tried to protest.

"Oh yes, definitely a picture." Allison smirked.

"Whose side are you on Chapman?" Dubenko pouted at her.

"Whichever side is going to get me a picture of you looking like Charlie Brown's Christmas tree."

"Say 'Mistletoe' Papa!" Sophie laughed as the camera flash went off.

After vowing to get his revenge, Dubenko helped his tormenters decorate the tree while they snacked on fresh from the oven cookies, thoughts of dinner completely forgotten. Once his daughter disappeared into the depths of the hall closet, where she had stored presents that she had earlier wrapped, Lee went to his roll-top desk and withdrew a leather portfolio. He sat it on the coffee table before joining Allison on the sofa.

The redhead picked up a floppy felt Santa hat and plopped it on the doctor's head as he slipped an arm around her shoulders. "Who knew Santa could be sexy?" She teased.

"Chapman, you are seriously warped."

"I'm in love with you, aren't I?" She grinned.

Dubenko just stared at her, at a complete loss for words. _In love with me? She's in love with me. When did this happen? Does it matter? Oh for God's sake, stop staring at the woman and say something, Lee. Anything. _"Thank you." He continued to stare as his mind raced. _Thank you? Thank you…is that the best you can do, moron? _"Allie, I, um, I don't…" He trailed off as her smile melted slowly and she looked away.

"You're welcome, Lee." Her soft voice was barely audible over the music pouring from the living room stereo. Allison stood and walked over to the fireplace. Crossing her arms over her chest she studied the photographs resting on the mantle. Tears stung the backs of her eyes as she furiously blinked. She refused to cry. She would not cry. Not here, not now. She had been so sure of his feelings for her just moments ago, had thought that his gift meant something more than it obviously did. Allison had been wanting to say those words to Lee for some time now, wanted him to know what he meant to her and now, suddenly she felt like she'd made a mistake. He didn't love her. He. Didn't. Love. Her.

Dubenko went into the kitchen, saying that he was going to put on some coffee. Allison nodded distractedly as he walked past her.

No longer sure why she was there, Allison tried to think of a reason to leave. _And do what? Go home and sit in an empty apartment on Christmas Eve? Joey and Andy are at his place and they don't want a third wheel interrupting them. Going in to work is out of the question. Do you really want the nerd herd to know what a pathetic loser you are? Stay. Maybe if you are really lucky Sophia will take a few more pot shots at you. _Sighing, she picked up a photograph of Lee and Marti. She was balanced on his knee and his chin was resting on her shoulder. They looked happy, no, she looked happy…he looked completely in love.

"Allie?" Sophie had come back to the living room andwas placing gifts under the tree. "What are you looking at?" The younger, shorter girl came up behind her and looked over her shoulder.

"That's a great picture of them." Sophie laughed softly. "Mostly because after I took it, Papa straightened out his leg and Mom fell on her butt."

Allison couldn't help but smile at that. "They look so happy."

"Allie, they were. You know, I thought they'd be together forever. Growing up it never even occurred to me that a lot of marriages weren't happily ever after." Sophie took the picture from Allison and put it back up on the mantle. "He doesn't talk about her, does he?"

Allison shook her head. "I asked what she was like once, but he changed the subject."

"Typical Lee Dubenko avoidance behavior. Get used to it. And learn to bully it out of him if you plan on sticking around. He'll make you crazy otherwise."

"I'm not really sure he wants me to stick around." She was looking at the brickwork as she spoke.

"Are you kidding me, Chapman? I thought you were actually smart. He's nuts about you. Papa wouldn't threaten to kick my ass to the curb for just anyone." Sophie didn't really like admitting she was wrong, nor did she do apologies well. She hoped that Allison would see this conversation as just that. An apology, the only kind she would ever give.

"He what?" The redhead's eyes snapped up to meet Sophie's bright gaze.

"He told me to go back to Richmond a few days after I got here if I couldn't make nicey nice with his girlfriend." Sophie bit her lip and then continued. "You know, that's the first time in six years he's said that word. Girlfriend. Actually I think this is the only real relationship he's had since my mother was killed. You make him happy." With that the teenager walked out of the room to find her father.

Allie quirked her eyebrows and tried to process what had just happened. Sophia Dubenko had not only willingly spoken to her, but there were no insults or innuendo involved. The girl had actually been kind to her. As for what the girl had actually said, Allison wasn't sure what to make of it all. Lee referred to her as his girlfriend. She smiled at that. She'd think about the rest of Sophia's words later; right now she just wanted to join the Dubenkos in the kitchen.

It was nearly midnight when they finally settled back into the living room to exchange gifts. Sophie was wearing the Santa hat and singing along with The Chipmunks on the stereo. Loudly and off key until Dubenko asked Allie to hold her down so that he could suture her mouth shut.

"But I still want a huuuuuuuuuuuuuuuula hoop!" She grinned as she scrambled across the floor away from her would be assailants.

"Sophia Marie, if you do not stop that incessant screeching the only thing you are going to get is my foot in your rear end." Dubenko threatened, only half jokingly.

She finished singing along with the CD at top volume before giving her father a cheeky grin. "Here is my ass, you may now kick it into next week." She wiggled her butt at them as she pulled a present out from under the tree.

Dubenko chuckled and planted his sock covered foot on her backside. "Don't tempt me."

"I won't give you any presents if you do." Sophie was pulling packages out from under the tree and checking the tags. "Here Allie, Merry Christmas." She handed a present to her father's girlfriend. "The tag says that it's from Lee, but I think he meant to write 'Grinning Goober' on it." She smirked at her father.

Allison laughed as she opened the package. Lee had given her a book on the history of medieval weaponry. Sophie looked at the two and shook her head before proclaiming them both to be completely weird.

A few more gifts were exchanged, most of them small and somewhat amusing to the parties involved. As Sophie was unwrapping a chocolate orange and wondering if it was really wise to eat such a thing given the hour, Lee picked up the leather portfolio he had earlier placed on the coffee table.

"Sophia?" He held the object out to his daughter as she looked at him strangely. "I've been meaning to do this for some time and well, now seemed like as good a moment as any."

She took the folio and sat it in her lap, "Mmm thanks."

"Open it, you imp." He took the chocolate ball away from her and set it aside.

"Hey I was going to eat that!" However, she did as her father instructed and opened the leather case. Inside was a stack of notarized papers, including the deed to the house in Richmond. "Oh, Papa…are you serious?" She looked up from her spot on the floor; sitting in the sea of discarded wrapping paper she looked much younger than her nearly twenty years.

"Of course I am, baby. The house is paid for and since I had no intention of ever selling it, I thought, well…it's yours, Soph. You've lived there your entire life, and now with me living here in Chicago it just makes me feel better knowing that there's one less thing for me to worry about where you are concerned. Merry Christmas, baby."

Dubenko got up from his seat next to Allie and gave his daughter a warm hug. "I love you, Soph."

"I love you too, Papa…I…I don't know what to say. Wow. I'm, oh Papa, thank you." It wasn't often that the teenager was at a loss for words, and she didn't know how to react to being so inarticulate, so she simply hugged her father again.

"Someone call Guinness, Sophia Dubenko is speechless." Dubenko ruffled her hair before rejoining Allie on the couch.

"Oh hey, Allie, there's another one for you." Sophie handed the redhead a giftbag.

Allison looked at the tag and saw that it was from the younger Dubenko. "Thank you…Oh! I love this stuff!" Allison pulled out several bottles of bath product ranging from body spray to lotion, all jasmine scented. She sprayed her forearm liberally with the perfume and waved it under Lee's nose. "Smell. Isn't it pretty?"

Lee glared at Sophie as he held his breath, trying not to gag. He was allergic to the plant and it gave him hives, even in a diluted form. "Ah Allie, don't…" He moved away from her as she poured the lotion on her hands and rubbed it in.

"Come here, I have too much of this stuff on my hands." She ran her palms over Lee's cheeks as she spoke.

"Oh shit, Papa! I'm sorry. I really am. I forgot…I bought that when I first got here and oh, geez…Allie, he's allergic to that stuff." Sophia looked horrified as Lee got up and went to wash his face, his eyes already watering and red welts appearing on his skin.

It was no secret that Sophia had completely despised Allison from the word go and the girl had childishly and purposely bought the lab tech the jasmine scented gift to get back at her father. She had also just as childishly forgotten what she put in the gift bag several weeks ago and didn't remember until it was too late to stop Allison from opening it.

Allison didn't know whether to laugh at Dubenko's daughter or strangle her. Instead she followed Lee into the downstairs bathroom. "I'm sorry, I didn't know."

He sneezed and then looked at her, as he toweled off his face and hands. "Chapman, get away from me. Please."

"Lee?"

"Until you wash that crud off, don't touch me." He was scratching at his neck. "I'm going to beat her."

"Lee, I didn't--"

"Will you go take a shower, Chapman? You're killing me."

"You shouldn't scratch at that…"

"Thank you, Dr. Death. Shower. Now." He sneezed again. "Where did I put the calamine lotion?"

"It's upstairs."

"Chapman, are you trying to torture me on purpose? Please go wash that stuff off." He looked at her imploringly. "Then will you help me slather myself in calamine before I opt to remove my skin with a vegetable peeler?"

As the two made their way upstairs, Sophie hung her head in shame. Lee shot her a look that spoke volumes and she merely muttered, "Merry Christmas, Papa."


	7. Chapter 7

_Dating for six months. Has it really been six months?_ Lee Dubenko was looking at his reflection in the mirror above the bathroom sink. He ran his hands through his damp curls and let out a long slow breath. _Six months. Half a year. And you haven't frightened her off or screwed things up. She hasn't gotten frustrated with your stalling in the intimacy department, hasn't been fazed by the noticeable age difference or the gossipmongers at work. She's even dealt with the wrath of the Sophie Monster and is still talking to you. Admit it, Lee; she's just as crazy about you as you are about her._

"Crazy. I must be crazy. Allie's obviously insane." He muttered as he worked a glob of gel into his hair. "In love. That's what she said. She's in love with me. And what do I do? Stand there like an idiot and stare at her."

It wasn't that he didn't love her in return. He did. Very much so, he was just realizing. Regardless, he just could not bring himself to say the words. The phrase he never thought he'd utter to anyone after Marti died. For once there was a problem Lee Dubenko couldn't wrap his mind around and come up with an answer. He couldn't make his feelings for Marti go away; in fact he didn't want to. He'd always love her. But he loved Allison as well. Maybe not as deeply, maybe not in quite the same way but the redheaded woman had become very precious to him and he didn't want to lose her.

_Disloyal to one and grossly unfair to the other. Or is it? There's a reason you never majored in philosophy, Lee. You suck at it. _He wiped his hands on a towel and made a face at his reflection. "Now or never, Dubenko. Make up your mind." He turned off the light and walked out of the room.

He and Allison had decided to spend the evening in; she had teased that she didn't feel like being smacked in the face with an appetizer when he originally suggested going out to celebrate. Once again he was mortified at how their first date had started off and apologized. Allison just laughed and left him sitting in his office.

While Dubenko was waiting for her to arrive he busied himself in the kitchen. He opened a bottle of wine to let it breathe while he tried to remember where he had last seen the book of matches he kept around for lighting the fireplace. He was sorting through the catchall drawer and mumbling to himself when the doorbell rang.

"Buttons, a sock, a scalpel…and I don't even want to know how that got in there, batteries, tape, Sophie's charm bracelet and a legion of post-it notes. Where the hell are the matches?" He shoved the drawer closed again and went to open the front door. "Coming."

Allison was standing on the front porch, her arms full and smiling at him. "Told you I'd bring dinner. I hope Chinese is okay." She knew it was. They ate take out often enough.

Taking the paper bag from her, Dubenko let her into the house, kissing her forehead as she squeezed passed him. "Depends on whether or not you have Kung Pao chicken in here."

"Maybe," she remarked lightly as she took off her coat and draped it over a chair. She grinned and turned in a slow circle to show off her calf-length skirt and wraparound blouse when she noticed Dubenko staring at her. "You like?"

"Looks…good on you." He smiled. "What do you mean maybe, Chapman?" He was looking in the bag containing dinner and frowning.

"Oh, fine. I try to seduce you with a sexy new outfit and all you want is dinner. Men."

"Sustenance first, seduction later."

"They teach you that in medical school?"

"No, some wisdom just comes with age and experience."

"Mmm, and you are wise."

"Did you just insinuate that I'm old?"

"You walked right into that one, Lee."

They continued the lighthearted conversation through most of their meal. Dubenko's thoughts, however, were largely focused elsewhere. He had meant what he jokingly said about seduction. Lee wanted her to spend the night with him. He had never denied that there was a great deal of physical attraction where Allison was concerned. For the most part he just failed to act on it. Now he wanted to act and not make a fool of himself in the process.

As he sat there picking at his dinner with disposable chopsticks, Lee let his mind wander. As usual, his thoughts settled on his late wife. His wasn't listening to Allison as she chattered on about her day, he didn't even taste the food he put in his mouth.

* * *

_Marti had come into the kitchen and dropped her keys on the countertop, the loud noise startling Lee, who had been lost in the stacks of research material that were scattered across the kitchen table. "Sophie's going to go home with the Jansens after the movie, so we have the house all to ourselves tonight."_ _She winked at him._

_Lee flipped his hair back out of his face and gave his wife a distracted nod. "Okay."_

"_Okay? Lee Pavlushshenka Dubenko, are you even listening to what I am saying?" Marti was leaning on the table, her hands planted firmly on the pages her husband was trying to read._

_The use of his full name in addition to the fact that she was obscuring his view caught Dubenko's attention. "What, Marti? I heard you. Sophie's going to the Jansens' this evening. What am I supposed to do, applaud?" He gave her an impatient look and tugged the loose pages out from under her hands. "I'm trying to work here, Beautiful."_

"_For a brilliant man, you are entirely too dense sometimes, doctor." She emphasized his title and tugged on his hair for good measure. "We. You and I, have the whole, as in the entire, house to ourselves tonight. No interruptions. No Sophie. No reason to not make love right here on the table should we choose to do so. Now do you understand me?"_

_Dubenko tilted his head and gave his wife a lopsided grin. "The table? Really Marti, we eat off this table—"_

_She smacked his arm playfully. "Shut up and come upstairs with me. Unless you'd rather work on," she waved her hand over the table, "whatever the heck this is."_

"_Success rates and methodologies for reattaching severed limbs. It's really very interesting and the advances made it the last ten years alone have been…" he trailed off as he noticed the annoyed look on his wife's face. "And I see that you really don't care about that." _

_Marti simply turned on her heel and walked out of the room. He could hear her footfalls on the stairs and pushed himself away from the table to follow._

_

* * *

_

"Earth to Lee, come in Lee." Allison was giving him a concerned look. "Is something the matter? You seem so far away all of a sudden."

"Just thinking."

"About?"

"You. Me. Us." Those three little words managed to convey so much as he took her hand in his across the table. "Us."

_If ever there was a time for subtlety and finesse, this is it._ He searched her face for any signs of what she was thinking. Still holding her slender hand in his, Dubenko rose from his chair and came around to Allison's side of the table. "I just realized that I never properly said hello. Come here." He tugged her hand until she stood up.

He placed her hand on his chest before wrapping one arm around her waist. Pulling her close, Dubenko slid his fingers into her soft hair and cupped the back of her head. "Hi." His voice was soft as he lightly brushed his lips against hers. Slowly, tenderly he deepened the kiss, all the while never taking his eyes off of Allison. He liked to watch her expression change as he kissed her.

Her eyes fluttered open as he pulled back, breaking the kiss. "Hi, yourself."

They had retired to the living room, bringing with them their glasses and the half finished bottle of wine. Dubenko had located the matches, on the mantle of all places. The orange glow of the fire bathed the room in a warm light. They had moved the coffee table to one side and were sitting on the floor, backs against the sofa as they talked and watched the flames dancing in the fireplace.

Setting her nearly full glass on the table, Allison turned to look at the hazel-eyed man who was currently plucking at threads in the carpet and staring off into space. She placed her hand on top of his nervously active one. "Lee, now what are you thinking about?"

His mind had again wandered and he had been thinking about the last time he had really made love, not the last time he'd had sex. There had been a few casual dalliances in the past five years, even a one-night stand shortly before he had left Virginia, but none of that meant anything to him. No, the last time he had made love had been with his wife.

* * *

_She was lying on her stomach, sprawled across their bed. Marti propped herself up on one elbow. She grinned at him as he stood in the doorway. "So good of you to join me, doctor." _

"_Marti—"_

"_That's Mrs. Dubenko to you." She interrupted with a wink and a sly smile._

"_You've never been addressed as Mrs. Dubenko a day in your life." Dubenko leaned against the door as he studied her. She had undressed and was wearing only her tee shirt. It barely covered the top of her thighs._

"_Would it kill you to work with me here, Lee?" She sighed in exasperation. "Will you come over here?" She patted the bed._

_Biting his lower lip while trying not to laugh, Lee Dubenko did as he wife asked and sat next to her on the bed. "Happy now, Mrs. Dubenko?"_

"_No." She looked up at him, wide eyed and with a pout on her lips._

"_And just what is it that I can do to make you happy, Beautiful?"_

"_I want you to touch me. Put those skilled surgeon's hands to good use." _

_He did as Marti asked, lying down next to her and running his hands along her body. He loved the feel of her, smooth skin and plump flesh. Pulling his wife into his arms, Dubenko kissed her and buried his face in her hair. He inhaled deeply, enjoying the way she smelled faintly of soap and talcum powder._

"_I love you, Mrs. Dubenko." He murmured against her neck._

_Laughing, Marti replied, "You ruined that fantasy already, Lee."_

_He snorted and nipped at her earlobe. "I must be such a disappointment to you. Whatever do you see in me, Martina?"_

"_The love of my life? A brilliant, kind and gentle man? A wonderful lover and companion? The fact that I have never once in the fifteen years we've been married regretted a single moment of my life with you?"_

_The playful light in his eyes turned serious. He hadn't expected her to respond that way. "Marti…"_

"_It's true, Lee, you know that. We've, I've, been so blessed. I have my health, my career, the best husband a woman could ever hope for, and our daughter…god, I can't believe she's in high school now. She's amazing. And here we are, ready to do this whole parenting thing all over again. Life couldn't be any better." She snuggled into his chest._

_Rolling over so that he pinned Marti beneath him on the bed, Lee studied his wife's face intently. "You left out the part where we make love, Marti." At that, he kissed her and spent a considerable part of the afternoon lost in his wife's arms. He marveled at how lovely she was as he moved above her, within her. He never got tired of making love with her, feeling her closeness, hearing her soft cries of pleasure. _I do that. I make her feel that way. _He couldn't help thinking as she cried out one last time._

_As they snuggled together in the middle of the rumpled bed, Dubenko ran his fingers through her hair, traced her facial features with his fingertips and trailed light kisses across her skin. "Marti, I've been thinking." He spoke softly, his lips to her ear._

"_Oh no, stop the presses. Alert the media. Dr. Lee Dubenko had a thought!" She laughed softly and took his hand in hers. _

"_I'm serious, Martina."_

"_You always are. What's on your mind, honey?" Marti looked at him curiously._

_He placed a hand on her belly, caressing it as he spoke, "I've been thinking about switching career tracks, spending more time at home. When Sophie was little, I missed so much. I was never here and if I was, I was sound asleep. I don't want to make that mistake again—"_

"_Lee, don't be so hard on yourself. You were in your second year of a grueling surgical residency. Of course you were busy. You worked a hundred and twenty some odd hours a week, not including call time? Do you think I didn't understand?" She placed her hand over his. "Sophie and I have never felt neglected or unloved, you have to know that."_

"_I have the tenure, Marti. The title of professor and I do enjoy teaching. I'd have the time to do my research and still have a set, predictable schedule. I wouldn't be tied to the hospital the way I am now, at the beck and call of a pager."_

"_You love practicing medicine too, Lee. You are a remarkable surgeon, hell that's all you ever talked about when we first met. Do you really want to give that up now, while you are at the top of your game?"_

"_I love you and Sophie more. I love this baby more." He patted her stomach. "I want to spend my time where it matters. With my family. I spend so much time taking care of others, that sometimes I don't feel like I take care of my own. That's not a pleasant realization." _

"_If you really want this, honey, then I do too. I just don't want you to regret—"_

"_Regret what? Being here? Being a husband and a father?"_

"_It's just such a big change…"_

_Lee Dubenko never would have imagined that three days later, his life would undergo a change much more drastic than the one he had planned._

_

* * *

_

He regarded her with a look that was full of conflicting emotions. Guilt, desire, confusion, longing--they all flashed behind his frameless glasses as he chewed on his bottom lip. His fingers still plucked at the carpet despite Allison's efforts to subdue the action.

"You can talk to me, you know," she said softly as she brushed a few stray curls off his forehead, letting her fingers trail through his unruly mane of hair. "I can tell something is bothering you, but I just don't know what."

Dubenko continued to gaze at her; he quirked his eyebrows briefly, licked his lips and then shook his head. "Allie, I…it's nothing. I just don't know what to say."

She looked away, and when she finally spoke, her voice was barely a whisper. "Do you want me to leave?" She pulled her hand away from his.

"What? No. I don't want you to leave. I want you to stay." He swallowed hard. "I want you to stay the night." _There, you've said it. The ball is in her court._

Allison smiled at him, her eyes shining. "Lee, do you mean that? You want me to stay here. With you. Tonight?"

"I wouldn't have said it otherwise." Both of his hands were now tugging at the carpet as he glanced around the room. _Now what? Now what do I do? What if I can't see this through? I haven't even…not since Marti_. He reached for his glass of wine to avoid saying anything else for a moment.

Allison, apparently deciding to take matters into her own hands, moved so that she was straddling his lap, facing him. "Hi."

Dubenko's lips twitched into a smile briefly. "Hi. Allie—" She interrupted him with a kiss, firm and square on the mouth. He brought his hands up to the ties on her blouse and absently played with them while studying her face. He liked the way her nose was upturned just the slightest bit, and he always wanted to trace the faint pattern of freckles that were scattered across her cheeks.

She cupped his face between her hands and leaned forward until their foreheads met. "Lee, you know I love you. I love your weirdly eccentric habits. I love the way you'll toss out obscure information at seemingly random moments. I love that even when I have no idea what you are going on about, I can't help but be enthralled due to your enthusiasm for the subject at hand. I love that you are, in turns, the most brilliant, charming, sweet and self-deprecating man I have ever known. I just love you."

He looked at her, wanting to answer her overwhelming declaration with one of his own but the words wouldn't come. "Allie, I…I, um. I don't know what to say." He panicked as he watched her face fall, her bright smile crumble and felt her hands slip away from his face.

"You could tell me you love me, Lee." The fear of rejection was written all over her countenance. "You could tell me how you feel. You could tell me why it is that you remain so emotionally distant. You could tell me to go to hell, just tell me something."

Dubenko reached up and removed his glasses, rubbed the bridge of his nose and glanced at Allison before fixing his gaze on the blazing fire behind her. When he finally spoke, his voice was even and controlled. "I was married for fifteen years to the most amazing woman, I had always thought that I'd spend the rest of my life with her. She was my world. Marti, Sophie, my career. Life was perfect. Surreal even. And then it was gone. She was gone. I had Sophie but I didn't really know what she needed from me. I did the best I could. I threw myself into my career. I retreated to the only place I found comfort—work. And I stayed there."

Lee looked at Allison, saw the silent tears trailing down her face and he swallowed hard before continuing. "I never thought that I'd find someone like Marti, someone who loved me for who I am, in spite of or maybe even because of my quirks as you called them. And here I am, with you. You're telling me that you do love me like that and I can't help but wonder how the hell I got so lucky, not once but twice in my life."

He reached out and traced the wet lines on her cheeks, let his finger glide over her soft skin and follow the contours of her face. "You want me to tell you how I feel, and I'm trying to, Allie. I've been trying to figure out just how I feel for so long now. I feel torn. I love Marti, as strange as that may sound to you, I still love her and I know part of me always will. I've tried to let her go, to move on with my life but I keep coming back to the fact that I still love her and I miss her every single day."

He pulled Allison closer, held her so that her head rested on his shoulder. He brushed her hair out of her face, gently moving the strands that stuck to the shed tears wetting her skin. Ducking his head, Dubenko lightly kissed her temple. "I'm sorry I'm making you cry. That's not my intent. That's why I haven't said anything. I don't want to hurt you. I don't want to be unfair to you. I care about you. I want you here. I just don't know if you still want to be with me after everything I've said. And that scares me. I don't want to lose you." He kissed her again and rested his head on top of hers.

"Lee, I know you still love your wife. I'd be a blind fool if I didn't see that. I've never thought I'd replace her. I don't want to. I couldn't. I just want there to be room in your heart for me too." She sat up and looked at him. "Is there a place for me, Lee?"

"Right here." He hugged her close. "And you already have a place in my heart. You have for some time now." Kissing her once more, Lee Dubenko made up his mind. "Come upstairs with me, Allie--I want to show you just how I feel about you."

* * *

"Mmm." Allison stretched her arms over her head and smiled before snuggling against Lee's chest. "So that's how you feel, is it, Dr. Dubenko?" She kissed his shoulder and looked up at him.

Dubenko smiled softly and traced the shape of her lips with the tip of his index finger. "If you didn't understand the initial lecture, I can always try to explain it to you another way. Perhaps a diagram would help?" He began tracing his fingers over her bare skin as he continued. "Pheromones, which are simply airborne chemical signals that are released by an individual into the environment and affect the physiology and behavior of the opposite sex—"

"So are you saying that it's just physical attraction? And stop that! It tickles!" She pushed his hands away from her stomach.

"Are you denying that there's chemistry between us?" His hands moved to her ribcage, poised to tickle her on purpose this time.

"No. I've thought you were attractive ever since I first met you. Stop changing the subject." She pushed his hands away again.

He wrapped his arms around her and pulled the younger woman against his body. "I wasn't changing the subject. You interrupted me. Shall we continue or will it suffice to say that along with the very obvious physical attraction, there is also a substantial amount of emotional attachment?"

"Well, I definitely feel that obvious physical attraction," she grinned as he pressed himself against her.

"Allison," his voice was thick with emotion as he stared fervently into her eyes, "I love you." He brought his mouth against her parted lips, preventing her from saying anything else, and kissed her deeply.

Some time later Lee Dubenko was lying in bed, watching the sunrise through his bedroom window. Allison was sound asleep next to him, her body tucked against his side. He was thinking about many things: life, love, loss and whether or not he was really ready to start over again. Then he looked down at the relaxed face of his sleeping lover and realized that he already had.


End file.
